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First Journey -- 35 mg GVG Options
 
WorkDoodler
#1 Posted : 6/11/2019 9:07:55 PM

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Posts: 9
Joined: 11-Jun-2019
Last visit: 10-Jan-2022
Well, first, hello all! I'm a new member here, and I recently took my first journey with this unbelievable medicine. Below is my experience taken directly from my journal. It's everything I could remember... I'm still processing it all, and I'm happy, proud, confused, blown away, growing, appreciative, and so much more.

I'd like to also thank you all for sharing your knowledge and experiences. Without this space, I would have been even less prepared for what was to come...

Journal Title: The Day After "Death"

So, it's 2:45 pm, and life is rolling along as normal, but I obviously cannot stop thinking about last night's experience (nor do I WANT to).

The entire experience, from start to finish, lasted 12-15 minutes, but for me it felt like even less! I know, a bit contradictory to others' experiences, but hey, each individual has their own experience, and mine seems like a 3-5-minuter.

First, I prepped THOROUGHLY!

- Breathing Exercises/Meditation
- Stretching
- Restroom Use
- Saged the house and myself
- Cleared the negativity and let go of anything not serving me
- Pre-journaled (a Gratitude entry)
- Closed windows (so no ambulance or police sirens would f**k with me)
- Lighting on low (Christmas lights on)
- 35 mg Dose in the Glass Vapor Genie on a bed of CBD flower and all THAT on top of six screens.
- Playing "Temple Bells" from the MyNoise App (usually what I sleep to)

I had also been prepping for a LONG TIME prior to this -- Heroic doses of mushrooms, micro and macro dosing psychedelics, philosophy class, journaling, self-growth, inner exploration, etc. I ALSO totally and fully RESPECTED (and do so even more now) the substance and experience to come.

My wife and I had talked a lot beforehand, and we were both prepared (as "prepared" as you can be for a first-time DMT trip -- both as witness/sitter and explorer/traveler). There was some anxiety going in, but we've discussed this enough to know what we were getting into (sort of...).

I sat on the edge of the bed, my wife to my left, and I took my final deep breaths before embarking on my journey... I knew that once I started, it was ALL THE WAY, NO BACKING DOWN! I went in with the idea and determination that I WOULD TAKE THAT THIRD HIT!... and I did, and I'm very proud of myself and my willpower, strength, and courage.

So, I put the torch to the GVG, and I slowly inhaled, and while I was inhaling, I KNEW it was a good pull... I held it, counting to 15 seconds in my head. With each second, there came a vividness approaching and growing on everything in my field of vision... There also began a ringing sound, and the environment (plants, the floor, the couch, the table, the desk, EVERYTHING -- ESPECIALLY the plants) began to become more "shape-based" (words aren't enough to describe it).. Things were showing me their TRUE form/being, and they were BEAUTIFUL.

I held in for a slow/long 15 seconds, and when I exhaled, it was as if the entire space kind of bounced or rippled... it was INTENSE. Everything was overlaid with geometric shapes, and there seemed to be a shine to everything.. The edges were PERFECT... really, everything was "perfect". I was in total awe, but I knew there was more to be taken in (and at this point, I wanted to articulate what I was experiencing, but I couldn't even get words out -- I only said aloud, "Oh yea.. this is crazy."Pleased.

I put the glass to my mouth, and I put the torch to the glass. I was REALLY having to focus on the second hit, and I could see the smoke going through the pipe, and I could feel the inhale... I'm not even sure how long I held this one in for -- it could have been 20 seconds, it could have been 7.. Time was leaving my space, my understanding. THIS hit FLOORED me. The shapes of the leaves on the plants turned 4D triangular, pyramidal, and the world was CRISP! On the exhale, the entire room broke apart into shapes -- 4D, spinning, geometrical, beautiful, color-filled shapes. There were rows and rows of peg-like, hexagonal/octagonal columns. They made up the entirety of the space.. of ALL BEING.. And the floor seemed to have separated.. And all of this came on with a "WHOOM!!" **Side note: At this point, I attempted to draw the columns out -- they truly were amazing.

I ALMOST handed the pipe to my wife, even saying, or at least thinking, "I can't take anymore," but I told myself I MUST finish what I had started.

I somehow put the bowl to my lips and the torch to the bowl, and I began what honestly felt like an ATTEMPT to take this third hit... Again, there is no recollection of the hit (length of pull or hold), but when I exhaled THIS one, I looked at my wife and asked, "How do I look? Am I OK?" She said I was doing great, and I laid back, said, "OK, I'm dying," and my soul began to leave my body.. but the word "LEAVE" doesn't really explain it...

I closed my eyes, and I was being transported through a fractal-like "tunnel" with a tiny center, expanding as it came closer to me (basic perspective), and it was a blue/green/purple color (but like.. all kinds of shades), and there were "beings" or faces (the word "faces" is being used pretty loosely here) all in this tunnel/time and space warp. It was fairly terrifying... Let's be real, it was TERRIFYING. At the same time, I was also feeling my physical body...

I had pissed myself (later, I would find this to be untrue), and what I thought was, "Ah, yes... I heard that happens when you die."

By the way, all these thoughts and sentences were said or thought in SUCH a calm manner. My wife said she was holding in her laughter.

THEN, I couldn't feel my body, and it felt like I breathed my final breath -- the last exhale, and I was dead...

And as I'm traveling through this, I feel myself kind of choking. I had TOTALLY forgotten how to breathe! I finally took a large breath, and my breath coincided with one of the gongs of a bell from the music I had playing lightly in the background, and this sparked a neon column to my right -- it glowed a brilliant, neon blue in sync with my breath and the bell, and it hit me that I may still actually be alive and that I should breathe, and once I began to take slow, steady breaths, I came upon the end of the tunnel, and I was just amazed...

I said aloud, "OK, this is a safe space." I was being comforted by what seemed to be three or more shadowy figures above me, and the space looked familiar -- FELT familiar.

At this point, I think I raised my hand toward them, and I just started trying to speak, and I finally got it out, "love.. Love.. LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE, I LOVE YOU!"

I was a baby/toddler.. They were parental and loving. I was attempting to tell them how much I LOVED THEM. I NEEDED to tell them how much I loved them. I needed them to know I loved them... and they knew, and they loved me, and they were caressing me, touching me, rubbing me, holding me...

I was floating, but I was laying in some sort of cosmic crib, and once I noticed this, I was my daughter, and I was looking up at myself and my wife (Side note: I have a 1.5-year-old daughter). I was telling myself and my wife that I loved them (us...). And the voice of the Universe spoke in my wife's voice and said, "I love you, we love you, it's OK, you're OK, it's OK, we love you, and you love us, and we love you, and it's OK."

And I could occasionally hear my wife (the real wife... real... such an odd word) telling me she loves me and that I was doing great. And I could feel her hand on mine -- holding me and holding the space, and I had to tell HER I love her (and not just HER... not just my wife, but every being she ever was/ever will be/her BEING). And I felt overcome with SO MUCH APPRECIATION!

And I laid there, being comforted and being comfortable (the most comfortable I've ever been in my entire life).

I thought about my childhood (as an infant), and I wanted so badly to be loved like I was being loved now... and the entities/Universe said that they could show me anything I wanted, but I was still in an almost shock -- scared but happy and safe but scared... and I said to them (when I say "said", I mean without telepathically or just happening without words.. odd) that i just wanted to stay in this space -- this comfort -- longer, and they let me, and I laid there in love and comfort.

And then, I opened my eyes, and the world still had a bit of an overlay to it, but I was back -- peacefully back. The other side was SO loving and gentle... I also had expected myself to be covered in piss.. Luckily.. I was not.

The End

Well, I hope everyone enjoyed, and I'd love to hear your feedback!! What a powerful and awe-inspiring medicine. Again, I am so grateful that this community exists, and I am so grateful for the experience I was blessed with.

"Just when the caterpillar thought her life was over, she began to fly."

 

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ridnovir
#2 Posted : 6/11/2019 9:50:24 PM

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Posts: 36
Joined: 24-Mar-2018
Last visit: 18-Aug-2021
Location: NYC
Good read Thumbs up Looks like you did your homework and took the first step well prepared.
 
WorkDoodler
#3 Posted : 6/11/2019 11:56:54 PM

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Posts: 9
Joined: 11-Jun-2019
Last visit: 10-Jan-2022
ridnovir wrote:
Good read Thumbs up Looks like you did your homework and took the first step well prepared.


Much appreciation!! Yes, the forum has helped significantly, and I look forward to continuing my exploration of this mystical realm and becoming a contributing member of this community.

"Just when the caterpillar thought her life was over, she began to fly."

 
MarduksHead
#4 Posted : 6/12/2019 3:41:47 PM

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Posts: 31
Joined: 12-May-2019
Last visit: 09-Apr-2020
What a beautiful trip. Now you know what you are.

The initial anxiety phase gets less and less with each time, once you realise that you are going to a beautiful place that will only show you love if you let it, you become awash with calm and you will will begin to look for ways to maximise the experience..

Breathing deep is key, it's like jumping into cold water, there is initial hesitation, then as you enter you quickly adjust only to realise you had nothing to fear. Your brain is programmed to panic when it becomes chemically perturbed - laugh at it, overcome it. When feelings and images of fear enter you can tell them to go away, and they do just that.

As you come up, allow yourself to be taken, allow all faculty and agency to dissolve, you must let it show you what it wants to show you, but pay attention as it's not all euphoria and colours.. there are profound messages there that you can retrieve and bring back.

It's important what you tell yourself too. Set and setting, music, the right trip sitter, meditation, breathing.
 
 
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