I hope this makes sense. I'll try to explain. I have had some experiences with entities. No entity experiences while broken through. Only manifestations while in the body.

But I, (for some reason) cant look at them or watch them closely. I notice them moving about in the background. I've had a dragon lady fly around in one trip. She came right up to my face a couple times then flew around again. But I couldn't seem to look her in the eye or study her... evaluate her...

Couple nights ago I went in, a jester appeared. The genderless being just danced around to my right. I could see it with my peripheral vision but couldn't bring myself to turn my head or move my eyes to look over at it.

Am I paralyzed with fear where I cant look around?

or can we not "search" with our eyes in these trips?

very interesting. Are you "aware" while you see them? Or are you just devoid of the thought of trying to look/analyze them.
I find it hard at first to get my bearings, and its not until after the trip I can think about what my actions were. Its all so...complicated lol

SO I'll map out my typical trip and this is without breakthrough.

I take the hit, Im overcome with euphoria for a second or two. The come up hits me. Anxiety hits, (sometimes im thrust into a vortex and then slam into the waiting room. Lose all sense of self). I bounce back to my body. I feel extremely apprehensive about what just happened...

What feel like a few seconds later (time now exists again) I stabilize, then I can focus more on the visuals and they start to intensify. At this point im quite calm. I sit back and enjoy the show so to speak... Randomly entities manifest out of the circulating patterns.. Then they dance or fly around. And I'm in a trance like state as they float around. But quite capable of what im seeing. I think, "damn theres a machine elf." Then I typically smile (I know im happy at that moment) and just experience it as the medicine wears off.

I am aware that I am in my body. I am aware that I am in my apartment and safe. I cant, however move and feel pretty couch locked.

From all that I've experienced on DMT, this seems like a fairly common phenomenon, at least at relatively "lighter" journeys where one is still able to hold some level of awareness of oneself, even if it is a minuscule semblance of some awareness of some "part" of oneself.

Relatively "deeper" trips can, and often times do, take all semblance of anything previously known by the traveler and throws them totally away for the duration, e.g. completely forgetting that "you" even exist or that "you" ever did exist or ever will exist (this is rather very common in relatively higher dosages + proper set & setting). Don't ever underestimate the factors of set, setting, previous psychonautic experience, meditation practice, breathing practice, ability to manifest inner calm rather effortlessly when needed, etc. All this and more plays a huge role in what you/not you experience when traveling the hyperspatial realms.

I suggest being patient with yourself and the DMT experience itself NikkiP. Patience can only help any situation really.

Perhaps try to think of it in this way (simply to help you get different perspectives on your question):

What if it's DMT's way of attempting to tell you that you need to utilize your peripheral vision more than you have in your life up until now? Heck, I have used peripheral vision techniques in various meditation practices over the decades, to be able to see in the dark much more clearly and to avoid catastrophic traffic accidents in the split-second nick of time.

That may sound rather odd, but DMT has communicated (never in words, but seriously communicated nonetheless) to me over the years many odd (but then ending up very useful/insightful) things that would make me give a big "WTF was that?" (always with a smile though) by the time I'd be approaching baseline consciousness after hyperspatial journeying.

Remember that any meaning that you might derive from a DMT trip is your choice of meaning and your's alone. No phenomena means anything at all from the vantage point of "The Biggest Picture", but we, as human energy fields, are, for whatever reason, meaning-making machines so to speak. It really seems at times as though creating meaning out of the whole, phenomenological universe (which "means" absolutely nothing in & of itself) is what we're actually "meant to do".

On the other hand, I could be totally "off my rocker" .

Best of luck to you NikkiP.!


Peace.

Good advice Doc!

I would like to ask to the OP... Is it that you can't look or you won't look?

If you can't look then it is largely out of your control so I would not worry about it too much and explore Doc's advice.

If you won't look, that is your choice. Next time muster the courage to look and engage. Sounds like you want to in some way. You may see something you need to see.

This^^^^^^^^Exactly!