Hello my fellow wanderers in the divine depths of consciousness,

I've been on the Nexus for the past 6 months actively, and now that I'm finally a part of it, I will share my story. Although it might seem like nothing amazing compared to all the mind blowing reports I read here and on Erowid, it was a very crucial moment in my life.

My first encounter with psychedelics happened around 7 months ago. There is a big mountain next to the city I live. One morning I decided I'm finally doing it, and went up high in the deep forest, all alone. It was a relatively hot summer day.

After reaching my designated spot, I laid a blanket on the damp forest ground and sat down. Downed on an empty stomach a sugar cube with an unknown amount of LSD freshly dropped on it. 45 minutes in, it all started. The following 8 hours mark the most meaningful,precious, pure and beautiful experience I have ever had in the 23 years of earthly life I had lived up to this moment.

My body and soul literally started resonating at the same frequency with Nature and the Universe themselves. I felt an extremely strong bond with every living thing. Emotions and energy flowed through me with unimaginable intensity. It was like I had become a conductor of energy between all things. I felt some kind of intelligence, an entity, watching over me. It was making sure that nothing bad would happen to me during the trip. It was guiding my emotions.

The happiness and joy kept flowing over me like tons and tons of invisible warm water. Love was bursting out of me with force I did not believe was possible. I hugged a pine tree and cried out of happiness while doing so. I could feel its soul. Every bush, tree, bird, squirrel, ant and fly were part of me in the same way I was part of them.

The experience taught me that with love and acceptance everything can be achieved. It made me a better person in every possible way. It dropped a curtain that has been put in front of my eyes with all the years of faulty education and living in the tyrannical corporate system that enslaved so many people, while making them believe they are free. All the stereotypes that were built with time got obliterated in a matter of seconds. All the anger, hate and negative emotions got swept away just like the ocean waves melt your footsteps on the sand.

I was a new man. And still am. Material goods are nowhere near my interest. My long term goals - moving to the Peruvian jungles. It's enough for me to live in a shack in the jungle, having a bed to sleep on, water to drink and fruit and vegetables to eat. My journey is spiritual. My goals - humble and generous. I hope that one day Mother Nature provides me the chance to become an Ayahuasca shaman. True happiness for me would be the ability to channel the entheogenic teachers' energy and wisdom upon all that need it.

I am prepared to give all my earthly time to what Mother Nature has in store for me and my life. We are all children of life. Light is in each one of us. We just have to find the strength to look through darkness and find it.

With unimaginable amounts of love and respect, I thank you for being here and sharing the knowledge and experiences you have. I will see you around, friends.

Now that was a positive note
Thanks for sharing.

Just.... well.... I favor to not end in contradictions that modern world is to be avoided and to end as an ayahuasca shaman. I feel there's a huge gap between [ayahuasca shamanism] and the [use of ayahuasca]. The first is a form of human constructed social culture for better or worse, the other is not.
Humans and "-ism"

Once I also wanted to hammock in the jungle for the rest of my life and there would be that old shaman preferable waiting for me to pass on his/her wisdom. But can you see there are a lot of projections/expectations going on? These are not in line with reality, sadly.
Wise man told me once: "The easiest way is to hermit and become enlightened. There is more merit in cultivating a splinter of that in social life."

Anyhow I would not count overly on the eternal grace-face of Mother Nature as her file record is far from nice-only. It was a special day for me, being hospitalized by tons of pain provided by our dearest Mother Nature and to be solved quite effectively and fast by the rotten money driven big pharma. It took away my black/white reasoning and the only thing I could think of was: happily I'm not in the jungle. There is light inside the dark, there is dark inside the light, tao-ists reflect this effect by the opposing colored little black and white circles:


While the even better image is this, now the fractal becomes better visible:


Slowly the good-bad / dark-light breaks up, the absolutes break up, that is why I post this, I thought to see some very absolutes in OP and I'd like to share my way of dealing with those. A bit like: no escape, even in the jungle.

While I know there is a sense of extremity in what I said, I would never come close to the assumption that life in Nature is a life through pink glasses. I have watched enough documentaries to have a slight idea of how many things can kill me in a jungle, as well as how hard can it be to life a self-sustainable life.But when you look at it from the other side, life in the city can be very unpleasant as well. Especially where I live.

There are hazards everywhere, but I believe that with the proper preparation and thoughtfulness one can be relatively safe.

Thank you for the words. Duality was part of my trip as well. A constant feeling of knowing a lot of stuff, and at the same time knowing nothing. Being in one place, but being everywhere in the same time. It was beautiful indeed.

Regarding the shamanism versus just usage of the molecules - I believe that in order for you to start walking the path of a shaman, the plants need to choose you first. It may not be something obvious, but a feeling inside you. A message from a higher reality perhaps? Then and only then can you truly start walking on that path and see if you are fit for it. Maybe I am wrong. Only shamans know.

Welcome to the forum Nydex. Have you read Antrocle's experience reports? If no, I think you may enjoy them.

Thank you Loveall. His reports are mindblowing. Especially the jungle one. Definitely the most amazing experience I've ever heard of.

Much love and respect

Welcome home

That sounds like an amazing first experience with Lucy. Glad you found the Nexus. Seems like a place you'll be benefiting from for sure!

Thank you Deadhead! I believe this will be my internet home for sure.