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A love of thunder? Options
 
Whatis
#1 Posted : 1/16/2017 8:20:16 AM

Its a question of perspective...


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Like all of my trips, this was 30mg, one long & slow draw through a classic VG. This particular trip was after a morning meditation session @ 7.30am.

It has been a while since I last blasted off. I was testing out a new batch before a weekend away with my brother and our girlfriends. I extracted 0.5g last Thursday from some old pots that I was about to throw away - glad I didn’t.

Finding myself back in the familiar DMT space was celebratory. Swirls of ancient party code were ripping through me. I don’t remember the come up I just remember being there.

Expansive infinity, with timeless entities. Vistas of familiar, yet totally alien, psychedelic lands.

For me, there is something about attention in this space, lots of entities on some kind of information superhighway were celebrating and trying to engage with me.

I have come to see that some of these types of entities seem to feed on me giving them some attention. All it takes is a slight shift of focus and I somehow give them life.

Nowadays I try not to give much attention to anything but stay as the awareness, as the space in the background before any thing. I do this in both hyperspatial travels and daily life. In hyperspace, this means only identifying with the space that everything is happening inside of. Because I don’t have a body, it seems easier to achieve this whilst journeying than in waking walking life.

I must have failed somehow because there was a moment of what seemed like a connection between a mischievous party maker type entity and my attention. He was represented by a multitude of devilishly purple grinning smooth charmers all dancing around.

When we somehow connected the entity was delighted.

‘Everything is ok. Because it is all one’ came the telepathic communication. I realised that I was enjoying our exchange.

I was reminded of nights of questionable sex, hedonism, and the pursuit of ultimate personal pleasure. There was a grimy joy pervading everything. Visually the entities were gleefully menacing and trying to show me things. I remember some kind of phone like screen, just out of reach of my vision. The entities swirled and slinked into the shadows and seemed like they were fucking (me).

There was an internal desire to disconnect, but I couldn’t really do anything, so I resigned and tried to enjoy the ride. Despite trying to reserve judgment their presence felt unwanted and yet wanted at the same time. Like the weird feeling before doing a dirty line of coke. ‘I know this will only lead to shit places, but fuck it, it’ll be fun. Maybe.’

I was coming back to earth now. The panoramic vistas seemed to slowly fold together as I drifted back. The familiar feeling of sliding back into time and body. Lots of juddery vibration. The entity was still there, dancing and fucking and feeding, more and more imperceptibly.

‘Everything is OK because it is all one’ came the realisation again. I was then suddenly aware that this belief was what might be giving this entity life. He gleefully pronounced that he was forever present across time and existence. It was some kind of contract with the light. If the light was given to him, he was free to do whatever he desired. And he absolutely loved this! He could play and pervert and that was all he is. Even though it felt like some kind of distortion of the light, it still felt like he had permission from the whole.

Everything is OK because it is all one’

Is it though?

In these final stages I was aware of a layer of awareness, the untouched one, that gives life to everything, then there was the entity, and then there was this belief, that he was feeding on. Attached to somehow.

Even though on some level I was enjoying our interaction, I physically pushed out my arms and said ‘No’. As a gesture to signal that ultimately, really, I was not OK with what I felt that he represented.

I guess this entity/belief has been a big part of my life in the past. I have alway sought out both sides of the coin in life. Like most people here I guess, I like to explore and push the boundaries, to see what I can learn about myself. Sometimes this has led to dark places. And sometimes I have rationalised some shady shit with ‘Everything is OK because it is all one.’

Perhaps it is time to give up this belief. Everything is one, yes, but some things are definitely not OK.

Or the whole is made up of both light and dark, but Light is lighter and Dark is darker.

Perhaps?
Much Love <3 xx
 

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#2 Posted : 1/16/2017 10:36:25 AM
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Really good report Smile Alot of what you said hit close to home.

Whatis wrote:

For me, there is something about attention in this space, lots of entities on some kind of information superhighway were celebrating and trying to engage with me.

I have come to see that some of these types of entities seem to feed on me giving them some attention. All it takes is a slight shift of focus and I somehow give them life.


Over the years for me attention had been a big part. The shift in focus is hair-thin too ime. It's easy to miss this aspect.. So much of how the experience can unfold and gain momentum is dependent on this.

Whatis wrote:
Nowadays I try not to give much attention to anything but stay as the awareness, as the space in the background before any thing. I do this in both hyperspatial travels and daily life. In hyperspace, this means only identifying with the space that everything is happening inside of. Because I don’t have a body, it seems easier to achieve this whilst journeying than in waking walking life.


This! You know, you're the first person that i've seen here that has said this or have done this. This is something that I've done for a long time [unless there's some aspect and/or entity that I feel can't be passed up]. Identifying with the place, the very thing we plunge ourselves into - we're that place. I find we're woven of the same stuff as That, the entities included. The highs, the lows, all the facets of this place/space [including its inhabitants] are of the same cloth. It's all God, it's all That, me included.

Most of the time I try to step back a notch and observe it all in its entirety, not locking into any one thing or aspect. It's all coming from this same ineffable place, so alot of the time I try to stay focused on this place from where everything is issuing forth, taking it all in while simultaneously observing the entities, structures, etc.

Staying as the awareness, that very thing behind our eyes, the thing that looks out onto the world and/or onto these experiences, I always try to stay within that, focused, though unattached by what happens, no matter how much my consensus reality changes - whether behind my eyes or out on the whole of reality - I try to stay focused within the thing that looks out behind my eyes, not losing this, no matter how crazy or overwhelming things get. No matter how much my outward reality shifts and transforms, the awareness remains.

Years back meditation helped considerably with 'staying within this awareness'. Kind of fell off from that, but the lessons stuck, especially with applying them directly to these experiences, they literally go hand in hand. Though now it's clicked to the point of it becoming entirely automatic when I get deep in with these tryptamine spaces.

I also do this in daily life. If I could say one thing that these experiences have done for me specifically, it would be how my awareness looks out and attaches/unattaches with every-day reality and the wide variety of things that I experience in day-to-day. When I go for long hikes in the middle of woods, as im hiking - this awareness that I look out onto my surroundings with is what stays predominant, I stay within it. It feels indeterminate, impartial, beautiful - I no longer am little-old-me hiking through the woods. I'm the experience itself, nothing localized, just right here - right now, this moment of experience, of awarenbess, that's it.




 
smoothmonkey
#3 Posted : 1/17/2017 3:03:58 AM

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Location: here and now boys, here and now
Sounds like an enlightening experience. Very interesting report, thankyou for sharing Smile
असतो मा सद्गमय ।
तमसो मा ज्योतिर्गमय ।
मृत्योर्मा अमृतं गमय ।
 
Whatis
#4 Posted : 1/18/2017 8:48:04 AM

Its a question of perspective...


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Joined: 24-May-2014
Last visit: 24-May-2023
Location: Everywhere/Nowhere
Thanks for reading and responding guys Smile

It is almost like click bait. I literally just saw '25 pics Ivanka Trump doesn't want you to see'. I felt an internal 'Ohhh, that might be interesting...' and had to stop myself from clicking. That's the hair-thin shift in focus you mention Tatt.

Quote:
So much of how the experience can unfold and gain momentum is dependent on this.

It definitely seems so to me too.

Have you ever found yourself on an internet page with literally no idea how you got there? Or thinking something totally off point and weird, when 2 minutes ago you were focusing on something else?

Thoughts seem to share this 'a shift of focus gives them life' trait too. And the shift of attention needed to give them life is also razor thin. Suddenly I will find myself following a train of thoughts, that are usually just random noise. I sometimes interrupt myself with a realisation of 'what the fuck am I thinking about?! I have no idea how I have arrived here!' And then I realise that the particular thought wasn't true anyway.

Much Love <3 xx
 
 
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