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DMT (48-50+mg) - inexperienced - The end of the Universe Options
 
RebornInSmoke
#1 Posted : 12/4/2011 4:47:02 AM

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when i typed this up i was still in shock and shaking from the sheer intensity. i had no idea just how powerful dmt could be. anyway, i hope you enjoy reading this.
i wont be doing it again any time soon.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

OMFG. measured less than 51mg dmt an loaded slightly less, about 2-4mg left in the measuring dish- melted over a half bowl of bud. screens id been using to smoke the dmt with before were placed on top, soaked and shining with residue (so at this point i dont know how much in total)... NEVER again. im still in shock.
unfortunately my window was wide open to hear rain, so my whole block has DEFINITELY heard some very, VERY crazy stuff.
i am seriously considering moving a lot sooner than my intended date at the beginning of next summer.
holy crap... i most certainly will never forget that for the rest of my life.
just... wow. i definitely do not want to do that again any time soon. i have had some very intense experiences in my career of consciousness exploration but nothing could have prepared me for this.

i was listening to a live techno set by richie hawtin as i took the rip. i didnt even inhale the full hit or hold it all in for long at all. reality immediately started spiralling away from me as i exhaled. the music overcame my entire being as my whole being shook and vibrated. my limbs flailed wildy, clawing violently at my face, my head, trying in vain to get away from the effects enveloping me.

imagine a dog thats been sprayed in the face by some poisonous animal, trying to get away from whats on his face and up his nose and in his eyes.

my vision became a multicoloured soup of fractalling, spiralling matter. it was as if my room became a black hole and all the light and matter was ripped and spun around at high velocity.
i kept grabbing at myself and rolling around, but it was no use. i remember thinking things like "oh fuck ive done it now, ive found the self destruct button of my existence, this is it i am no more." and an indescribably strong sorrow at the prospect of never being able to see my family or friends ever again, never being able to tell them one last time that i love them.
i felt that i had somehow unravelled the universe. that this was it, game over, theres no going back. do not pass go, do not collect $200.
it just kept getting worse and worse, every cell, every atom and subsequent particle was simultaneously melted down and ripped into infinite pieces. there was nothing i could do to stop it.
the universe was ending and i had done it to myself. so much fear and sorrow.
i closed my eyes for this ordeal as with them open the sensory overload was just way too much for my brain to deal with while this shit was going on.
halfway through this i remember hearing the music through the intense WOOSHING rushes of energy and uncontrollably grabbing my sheets and humping my hips up n down off the bed to the beat. wether or not that has something to do with the message to follow i dont know, but what was to follow next was incredible.


Love.

i feel born again.
the most important thing ever is LOVE.
i cannot describe it. those who have been through it will understand, but unless you have, there is no possible way i could do it justice. i was shown the pure inherent love of the universe. i will never forget that for as long as i live.

as reality came back piece by piece i became "unblind" slowly, but my vision was still massively buzzing and shaking, my body and mind were in shock.
never in my life have i experienced anything like that and nor do i have any desire to repeat it.
i feel reborn and rejuvenated. i have found what i have been looking for my entire life without knowing i was looking for it. love. love within myself.

i definitely want to start living better than i have been, and not taking life for granted.
i guess having reality and the universe torn from under my feet has shown me a much deeper appreciation for my existence and the people in it.

im still in total awe and just thinking "holy f*ck". in all reality my dose was probably between 40-50mg, or even more. i really dont know or care at this point, all i know is it was too much.
i had only used dmt twice before this at levels of about 20-30mg. the screens on top of the dmt soaked bud had a LOT of residue leftover from the first two times. in hindsight what the hell was i thinking?!?
i definitely have a huge amount of respect for this tryptamine after all this.
upon reality coming back i have NEVER EVER in my life felt relief as strong as that. IT IS TRULY AMAZING TO BE ALIVE!





words cannot describe how grateful i am to have been given the gift of life back.
Gun it to 88...
..::those who speak do not know, those who know do not speak::..
<3
 

Good quality Syrian rue (Peganum harmala) for an incredible price!
 
C12N2H16
#2 Posted : 12/4/2011 5:52:32 AM

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DMT
 
Bill Cipher
#3 Posted : 12/4/2011 7:02:37 AM

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C12N2H16 wrote:
DMT



True that.

Welcome back, soldier. You've just experienced something that very few people ever will. You never have to go there again, but I'll wager that you'll never be completely the same person either.

What a gift. What a privilege. What an extraordinary mystery that we actually get to bear witness to.
 
ewok
#4 Posted : 12/4/2011 8:22:24 AM

.


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No words give the experience justice just have to go there yourself. As art said few experience it so fell lucky your one that has.
Black then white are all I see in my infancy.
Red and yellow then came to be,
reaching out to me, lets me see.
There is so much more and it beckons me to look though to these,
infinite possibilities.
As below so above and beyond I imagine,
drawn outside the lines of reason.
Push the envelope. Watch it bend.
 
tele
#5 Posted : 12/4/2011 10:14:39 AM
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Whoa I'd probably would be saying I would not be doing it soon, too, if I were to be inexperienced and blast off with that dose.
 
smokerx
#6 Posted : 12/4/2011 12:45:39 PM

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tele wrote:
Whoa I'd probably would be saying I would not be doing it soon, too, if I were to be inexperienced and blast off with that dose.


Yes , me too Smile
We are each of us angels with only one wing, and we can only fly by embracing one another.

*********

We are all living in our own feces.
 
tele
#7 Posted : 12/4/2011 1:16:52 PM
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Yeah, mild doses are the way to start. After one has explored enough there it's time to go to the deeper pool.Wink
 
RebornInSmoke
#8 Posted : 12/4/2011 1:33:28 PM

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im guessing i consumed a pretty strong dose for a first timer? (3rd time using dmt but you get what i mean)

i feel very humbled right now. im certainly grateful for this experience but holy hell next time im dosing less.
i was NOT prepared for my entire self being catapulted at a million miles an hour into a black hole, in a matter of mere seconds.
going from baseline into that was terrifying. i would do it again but a lot more controlled next time.
ie prepare myself both mentally and physically beforehand, and im going to be more strict and cautious with dosing.

ive had other life changing and profound psychedelic experiences but dmt takes the cake.
i completely agree with this site's "Attitude" thing and ive read the "why you should never sell dmt" thread and completely agree.
this is potentially dangerous if not used properly. not for the masses thats for sure.
it would be nice if our species as a whole was ready but unfortunately i dont think we are there yet.

it honestly felt like what i imagine dying and birth to feel like.
as reality came back i genuinely felt as if i was reliving my birth.
an odd time to say the least.

thanks for the replies. im glad i registered here.
i get the feeling this is the beginning of a long and deep journey with this sacrament.
i most definitely wont be using it simply for "fun". (not that that was my intention to begin with though, it wasnt).
Gun it to 88...
..::those who speak do not know, those who know do not speak::..
<3
 
tele
#9 Posted : 12/4/2011 2:21:17 PM
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RebornInSmoke wrote:
im guessing i consumed a pretty strong dose for a first timer? (3rd time using dmt but you get what i mean)


Well yeahLaughing

Just take it slow from now on. You won't have to be afraid of your next experience being as intense if you load less.
 
AluminumFoilRobots
#10 Posted : 12/4/2011 3:21:29 PM

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I find n,n-DMT to be less-than-astounding at low doses, it's kindof an all-or-nothing thing (for me);
(my first experience was a powerful one, too, high-dose... isn't it amazing how absolutely different high-dose DMT is from ANYTHING else you've ever tried?)

I love first time reports!
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

Fairly responsible Kratom user.

"whenever he drank ayahuasca, he had such beautiful visions that he used to put his hands over his eyes for fear somebody might steal them."
in between the grinding-brakes of a train crash while aluminum-foil robots make obnoxious sex noises on a static-filled walkie-talkie radio.
 
RebornInSmoke
#11 Posted : 12/4/2011 4:04:14 PM

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AluminumFoilRobots wrote:
(my first experience was a powerful one, too, high-dose... isn't it amazing how absolutely different high-dose DMT is from ANYTHING else you've ever tried?)


never in my life have i taken anything that has made the universe end then given me the experienced of rebirth.
this is not a drug in any conventional sense...
ive tripped pretty damn hard on acid and other things but this was nothing like anything that has ever happened to me in my 21 years on this planet.
Gun it to 88...
..::those who speak do not know, those who know do not speak::..
<3
 
soulfood
#12 Posted : 12/4/2011 4:26:57 PM

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AluminumFoilRobots wrote:
I find n,n-DMT to be less-than-astounding at low doses, it's kindof an all-or-nothing thing (for me);


I used to be the same, but for me now the only way to fly is with oral MAOI and smaller doses Smile

To RebornInSmoke,

Sounds to me like you were initiated through trial by fire and passed with flying colours Smile

Call it high intensity training for the mind...

and DAMN does it work!!!

Very happy
 
actualfactual
#13 Posted : 12/4/2011 5:12:47 PM

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Quote:
i kept grabbing at myself and rolling around, but it was no use. i remember thinking things like "oh fuck ive done it now, ive found the self destruct button of my existence, this is it i am no more."
[snip]
i cannot describe it. those who have been through it will understand, but unless you have, there is no possible way i could do it justice. i was shown the pure inherent love of the universe. i will never forget that for as long as i live.
[snip]
i definitely want to start living better than i have been, and not taking life for granted.
i guess having reality and the universe torn from under my feet has shown me a much deeper appreciation for my existence and the people in it.
[snip]
im still in total awe and just thinking "holy f*ck".


I can completely relate. Smile

 
corpus callosum
#14 Posted : 12/4/2011 6:00:40 PM

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All I can say is I salute you, and if you never repeat this level of experience again in your life (which is entirely understandable) you have witnessed a comprehensive level of annihilation that few people have.An entirely different kettle of fish than the 20-30mg breakthroughs and one which defies description and comprehension.Well done Sir!!!Very happy Shocked Laughing
I am paranoid of my brain. It thinks all the time, even when I'm asleep. My thoughts assail me. Murderous lechers they are. Thought is the assassin of thought. Like a man stabbing himself with one hand while the other hand tries to stop the blade. Like an explosion that destroys the detonator. I am paranoid of my brain. It makes me unsettled and ill at ease. Makes me chase my tail, freezes my eyes and shuts me down. Watches me. Eats my head. It destroys me.

 
Simon Jester
#15 Posted : 12/4/2011 8:35:20 PM

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RebornInSmoke wrote:


Love.


Quoted For Truth
 
Godzillas
#16 Posted : 12/4/2011 9:01:24 PM
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awesome report...

question, did u notice ur heart beating crazy like it was going to explode? or did u forget u even had a heart?
 
tele
#17 Posted : 12/4/2011 9:33:21 PM
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All you need is love is the one of the truest things ever.
 
Mindlusion
#18 Posted : 12/4/2011 9:35:19 PM

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awwwesome,

this makes me want to experience another universe shattering breakthrough Smile
Expect nothing, Receive everything.
"Experiment and extrapolation is the only means the organic chemists (humans) currrently have - in contrast to "God" (and possibly R. B. Woodward). "
He alone sees truly who sees the Absolute the same in every creature...seeing the same Absolute everywhere, he does not harm himself or others. - The Bhagavad Gita
"The most beautiful thing we can experience, is the mysterious. The source of all true art and science."
 
RebornInSmoke
#19 Posted : 12/4/2011 10:31:41 PM

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I wasnt even paying attention to my heart. I had no idea what was happening to me.
Upon exhaling I immediately put the bong down, swung my legs round onto my bed and lay down.
everything was going in sort of slow motion, and sort of jittery like going 5 frames forward and 2 back, and so on. (but all as fluid motion. hard for me to put into words)
The music I distinctly remember being very intensely good. I would love to explore music with this at a lower dose.
It all happened so fast...

I was laying down, arms by my side, and sound was sort of distorted for a second, all silent, put your hands over your ears and that sound but deeper. Just for a second, then the music came back, SCREEEEEEAAAAAAMING loudly, every bit of universal data amplified beyond belief.
This audio effect happened in waves.
My head was rocketed at a million miles an hour. Where, I dont know, but this is what it felt like.
It was as if my being was exploding, cell by cell, atom by atom. Maybe it was what keanau reeves felt like when he touched that mirror?
I feel that a big part of the distress and also why I was grabbing at my face and head, was to do with not being prepared for or expecting to be ripped out of my body at a million miles an hour.

Gun it to 88...
..::those who speak do not know, those who know do not speak::..
<3
 
oden
#20 Posted : 12/4/2011 11:24:45 PM

odin the one


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Bless you man!!!! your,s was just like mine minus the music..never never never have i known anything like it.. the loss you felt and now know. will forever change you..Art van.. said it soo very well..soo much respect to you.. spice is one hell of a teacher.. you truly know what its like to be ripped apart to the smallest of anything you could have ever been... there is nothing like the feeling of. OMG i just killed myself i will never return!!! i had many of the same thoughts you had... but after you just cannot help but see the beauty and perfection in everything. you see ,you taste ,you hear,you smell!!! soo much love to you man!!! welcome back!!! now heal the world!! Peace my friend!! Oden
 
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