Hi oneis,
Welcome to the Nexus & congratulations on your first DMT experiments. Exciting times, eh?
To me, when ۩ said All Is Reflection, I think he hit on a big truth with DMT. The mirror. It can be daunting and cause anxiety. Truly facing our fears, dealing with our demons, including our pasts, exploring the corners and crevices of our minds, even the poorly lit ones . . . . and finding incredible healing, unity and mysticism along the way.
So I would say to you: Think you might be able to do it WITHOUT the Xanax? I admit it's hard. Sometimes my heart is pounding and my hand is shaking so bad I can hardly hold the pipe/torch well enough to get it started.
Another suggestion: Maybe find a comfy reclining chair, couch or bed. Maybe turn the computer off, find a quiet, calm, private space. Maybe take your hit(s), then try to lay back, CLOSE YOUR EYES, relax, surrender and just let go of everything, including all assumptions, attachment to your body, etc.
DMT is so amazing it seems like magic. I hope you have many wonderful and magical journies to come.
Peace & Love
P.S.: Speaking for myself, with many many hundreds of journies, I almost never go to the same place twice - very very rare for me. For me DMT IS novelty and not much else is in my multi-decades life. The fact that it's always different for me is one of the many things that keeps me coming back.
"But even if nothing lasts and everything is lost, there is still the intrinsic value of the moment. The present moment, ultimately, is more than enough, a gift of grace and unfathomable value, which our friend and lover death paints in stark relief."-Rick Doblin, Ph.D. MAPS President, MAPS Bulletin Vol. XX, No. 1, pg. 2Hyperspace LOVES YOU