Edit-
Ah!!! Swim says there's so much more that he wants to tell you, but he can't put it all down here. He'll save it for an introduction.
Swim has simply urged me to tell all of you about the recent experience he had. Swim says that although he doesn't know any one of you personally, indeed has not even communicated with you in any way previously, he feels that it's the right thing, or rather, you're all the right people, that Swim should tell. So here I am to convey Swim's message. Swim says it's a long one, but, he needs to get all of this out.
Over the past year and a half, perhaps just a little longer, Swim has been working his way up to the hallucinogenic experience. Various things led up to this, and Swim wants me to assure all of you that he will get to that soon enough and have me type up an introduction for you in due course. Basically, the culmination of all of Swim's experiences, changes of thought, and knowledge, had lead him to attempt his first extraction over this weekend.
Swim says he believed he had all the things that would facilitate an easy experience, and he believed he does still, but he needs to make use of
all of them. I'll get to that part of Swim's story in a moment. Swim over this past month has procured a beautiful Sherlock VG, a lovely butane torch, incense of several sorts, charcoal tablets and incense burners, as well as all of the other necessary ingredients to embark on a Journey. Swim had been smudging and past couple days in preparation, but, he didn't want to rush things. He wanted to do the right things.
Swim wants to make it clear that Swim was never looking for a joy ride, or just a diversion. Swim says he knew this was something to be explored and was and still is an absolutely necessary thing to experience. Yesterday evening, Swim began his extraction, and, after a failed first attempt, started early this morning on a so far successful second attempt. Swim had put the mixtures in the freezer, but, became somewhat impatient, as his naphtha had not precipitating any crystals. Against his better judgment, he tells me, he took one of jars out after only several hours after seeing that it had been precipitating. All said and done, Swim tells me he came up with a total of 10mg of very fine, white, fluffy medicine.
Initially disappointed because it wasn't what he had come to think of, as a lurker here for nearly a year, as a 'usual' or 'normal' dose of 25-30mg. Swim, in a moment of brightness decided it was best to wait, and that it wasn't worth the attempt with such a small amount. Shortly thereafter Swim, against his better judgment again, decided that he would try it. After all, he believed it would ease future travels were he acquainted with his goods. Swim also had a small, niggling amount of skepticism left, that he simply had to get rid of. He had to know if it was something real, or rubbish that thousands of people have intricately webbed so as to seem real. Swim got ready. Swim made the copper filter, heated it, and laid the spice down. Swim was ready. Or so he thought.
Swim didn't smudge immediately before use, but, he did turn off anything that could have been distracting. Fans, computer, phone, all off. Swim set some very relaxing mood lighting. Swim setup an audio recorder nearby, and a notepad with, since Swim had the feeling they would come in handy after an experience. Swim got in bed, partially under the covers, and sat upright. Swim got the shakes. Swim, against his better judgment yet again, decided to just go for it. Swim lit up, shakes ramped up a little, started freaking out just a little, saw the vapour, and inhaled.
Swim tried to take a large pull, but failed with the hyperventilation that had set on before lighting up. Swim then tried to hold in as long as possible, and failed. Swim laid himself down on his bed. Swim initially thought his skepticism was right, that there wasn't anything to it, but then my oh my, immediately afterword, Swim felt it. Swim started to freak out. Swim let a small cloud of vapour; a rather pathetic one from a pathetic pull held for a pathetic amount of time. Swim noticed first a tingling that started at the feet and worked its way up. Swim was tingling, everywhere, all over. Nearly simultaneously, Swim realised, truly realised, that everything is connected. Swim 'knew' this previously, as he has experienced a similar feeling various times while lying in silence, with no thought pollution. This, however, was amplified 1000x and was undeniable. It's true and there's no denying it.
Swim kept his eyes open the entire time because Swim's ego was freaking the fuck out (please excuse the crudeness). Swims ego was experiencing death, but it wasn't ready to go. No way, Ego was quite happy where it was and rather wanted to stay. Swim reassured his ego multiple times that it was OK, he wouldn't actually die, and it helped somewhat, but Swim's ego was still freaking out, just not quite as much as at first. Swim then noticed the walls, objects, everything, breathing. Everything is alive, Swim realised, in one way or another. This amplified the feeling of connectedness. Then Swim's mood lights started casting lovely patterns on the wall, but Swim's ego was still going ape about its potential death and Swim was spending too much time reassuring it to take in the magnificence sensed.
Swim wasn't entirely successful at keeping his eyes open continuously. There were short periods where the lids lowered for the briefest of moments, but Swim saw. Not much, but more than what he saw externally. They were visual patterns, but Swim sensed there was a little more to them than just eye candy. Swim is interested in these. Toward the end, and for a time after, behind closed lids, Swim saw a visual that represented a door. Swim knew the door as one that had been closed until this point and was now slightly ajar. Swim felt no hostility from what lay beyond, but no particular eagerness from what lay beyond either. Swim knew that the door had been opened just a bit, and that if Swim wants, Swim can go right on in. But it's up to Swim to decide that. What lays beyond isn't there to harm Swim, but Swim must make the choice to go through the door entirely and let his ego go.
Swim then lay there for approximately 25 minutes talking for the audio recorder and himself about the experience, about everything he had me type above. Swim talked about it to himself, and about his surprise that 10mg did that. Swim was blown away. With 10mg, vapour horribly pulled and likewise held, Swim knows it to be amazing, and to be something worth exploring, but something that has to be dealt with cautiously. Swim become particularly flabbergasted by those of you here claiming 20-35mg is a 'normal' dose and that toward the upper end is needed for breakthrough. Swim then though of those that spoke of 40, 50, even 70mg hits. Swim thought all of you must be insane. Swim knows better, and that was simply his ego exaggerating.
Swim is unsure if his experience will make it easier the next time he ventures out, or if it will make the ego freak out even more, now that it knows what happens when the machine and lighter come out. Swim must try again, but Swim will remain cautious.
Thanks for bearing with me, here. Swim thanks you for reading.
