When SWIM was 21, he finally decided he was ready to begin exploring psychedelics. LSD had fascinated him for quite some years, but he'd always refrained from partaking - set and setting he said - and he knew his mind had better be ready for it.
The idea of a 12 hour trip was still scary though. A friend of SWIM had something he called elf spice for sale. A little bit of research told SWIM that this "elf spice" was DMT. He'd never heard of this drug before, but his research said the trip would last no more than about 15 minutes, and was far more powerful than LSD. The way SWIM saw it was, if he could handle 15 minutes of something he read was "the most powerful hallucinogen known to man," 12 hours of even LSD shouldn't be a problem. So SWIM purchased 7 doses of this elf spice.
Smoking the DMT was a learning process. SWIM decided to try a lightbulb vaporizer, as this was the recommendation he found by searching the web.
A friend of SWIM and SWIM himself took turns, his friend went first. Both had an enjoyable experience. Reflecting, they feel they most likely reached level 2 on this trip. Other methods were tried, including mixing the DMT with some marijuana in a bong. This seemed to work better than the lightbulb vaporizer did.
After 5 doses were used up, SWIM decided to keep the other 2 does for stock. Drugs are hard to come by in SWIMs area, and he knew that he likely wouldn't be able to buy DMT again for a long while.
SWIM continued to experiment with other substances - LSD and 2C-E most notably. SWIM formed lots of theories about existence in this time.
Months passed, and SWIM had not done any psychedelic substances, save for one uncomfortable LSD experience when SWIM decided that LSD was meant to be done outside during warm weather, not inside in the cold.
Then a friend showed him "Alien Dreamtime" with Terrence McKenna. It was like someone had handed SWIM a bible for the religion SWIM had written in his head. This was heavy stuff.
A few nights later, SWIM showed Alien Dreamtime to a close friend of his. She understood the ideas and found them appealing, but had never done any psychadelic drugs. SWIM had only introduced this friend to Marijuana perhaps 8 months earlier, and the first time she smoked with him, she freaked out and had a difficult time with it. Since then, she was smoking quite regularly on her own, and had also experienced a very powerful batch of cannabis edibles that SWIM had made. He had already promised to experiment with her the coming summer with psychedelics, but wanted to be sure she was ready for it - set and setting. "I'm ready to smoke DMT," she said. SWIM was a little apprehensive. He didn't want to put her though anything negative, and based on his own experience, didn't think the set and setting was right. But the energy he was reading said otherwise. He could tell that she was right, he could tell that there couldn't be a more perfect moment, and he knew that if he really wanted to share these experiences, he needed to give this friend some of his DMT. He wanted to ease her in, so he cut one of his last two doses in half, laid down a layer of marijuana, a layer of DMT, and another layer of marijuana into a bong's bowl. Then he let her smoke it.
When she finished, she was nearly in tears. Positive tears. She thanked SWIM. She told SWIM that this single experience was far more valuable to her than "3 years of weekly therapy." Based on many of the things she said after the trip was over, SWIM believes she experienced a level of ego death. She told SWIM that he had saved her life. SWIM could feel that his room was filled with positive energy. He decided to smoke the other half of the dose. The experience was about as powerful as previous DMT experiences for SWIM, and it was wholly positive. This was the night that SWIM decided that unlike LSD, DMT was okay to do in other settings than warm summer days.
Swim did a lot of thinking the next day about DMT. Between his experiences the night prior and every other time he'd smoked DMT, he was suspicious that he'd never reached the full DMT experience, never hit "level 3," never "broken through". On the way home from work, SWIM decided when he got home, he would smoke his last dose - and hopefully this time - would break through and meet the machine elves.
He carefully put a very small amount of marijuana into his bong. He powdered, the best he could, his last dose of DMT. He was able to scrape a little bit of DMT off the foil the previous night's dose was stored in, and added this as well. Again, he carefully layered a very small layer of marijuana on top.
SWIM then cleansed his room. He played a very positive themed song and repeated positive chants. "I am filled with love. I am filled with love. I am filled with love," he said again and again. He allowed his positive energy to fill himself. When the song finished, he started a playlist he had specifically prepared for this event, picked up his bong, and lit the bowl. SWIM inhaled deep. He was sure to burn the entire bowl and has gotten very efficient at taking massive hits in his tube bong from all of his marijuana smoking. He inhaled all of the DMT at once, clearing the bong. And he held it in. And he put down the bong and the lighter. And he held it in. And he laid down on his bed. And he held it in. And things began to look funny. And he held it in. And SWIM started to feel a rumble, like a rocket in the first stage of launch. And he held it in. And then, as the world began to morph, SWIM exhaled, and the smoke swirled away from him. And SWIM began to feel something he'd never felt before. First, SWIM panicked. "What's happening?" he wondered. He was losing control. Reality was going away. And it was
terrifying. "I'm ready for this to stop," SWIM thought, as if there was some conscious choice still left at this point. "It's okay, it will only be 5 minutes," SWIM thought. But then SWIM realized, only about 5 seconds of music had played since he laid down. How? It'd already felt like minutes had passed. "No, this is a good thing," SWIM said to himself, "embrace it. Let go. Let go. Let go." And the modern man that held onto control let go. And reality dissolved. And SWIM experienced something he'd never felt before. SWIM felt as if reality was a pad of paper, and physical reality was the top page. Something grabbed this page in the center and tore it away, revealing the page beneath. "Oh, all the beautiful everything" were his last English words before he made it back to this planet. The page beneath is difficult for SWIM to describe, but knows that most people who read this don't need it explained. SWIM met glowing white entities, balls of pure energy in this new realm. These entities seemed to be all knowing, and they spoke to SWIM.
They re-assured SWIM about all of his worldly insecurities. They showed SWIM who he was, not as an individual person, but as a people - as a human being. They showed SWIM the efficient machine that every Homo Sapien is. They attempted to explain existence to SWIM, but he did not understand. They urged SWIM to focus. They showed SWIM the society that we are intended to create. They showed SWIM the destiny of humanity. They showed SWIM Utopia.
When SWIM came back, he was relieved. And then, SWIM was overjoyed. And then SWIM stood up, and SWIM danced. He danced and watched himself in the mirror, and he did not feel like he was watching himself, because he'd never danced so well in his life. And SWIM saw all of the things which held him back, and knew that he must set them aside. SWIM knew he must overcome his thing fetish. SWIM knew he must overcome his addiction to marijuana. SWIM's ego had been thoroughly dismantled. SWIM was reborn, and SWIM had reset the compass inside himself that told him where he was headed. SWIM wrote down "It was real, and don't forgot it" on a pad of paper.
SWIM learned a few other things on the trip:
-He shouldn't use marijuana with DMT, he should find another herb that won't impede his focus
-The music definitely made coping with the trip easier, as it was the last thing he had a concept of before he broke through. On the other hand, SWIM feels it may have also been a distraction. He'd like to eventually try to isolate as much external noise (and this means all sensory information) as possible. SWIM has some high quality hearing protection and would like to eventually bring up his comfort level to the point that he can wear a blindfold and this hearing protection during the trip. SWIM feels this will make it easier for him to let go of his body entirely, and hopes it will allow him to communicate more clearly with the machine elves.
-When SWIM dies, he will have an experience much like the one he had on his bed (SWIM claims to only be 99.99% sure of this one).
SWIM is not going to stop smoking Marijuana entirely as he still considers it a valuable tool. However, before this experience, he smoked marijuana a minimum of once a day, and usually that number was 2+ times daily, especially on weekends, when he often would smoke all day (if he had nothing else to do). Since this experience though, SWIM has not smoked any Marijuana. SWIM has cleaned up loose ends at his job. SWIM has begun cleaning up loose ends at home. SWIM began to worship his body, as he knew for so long he should.
That night, SWIM started taking 5-HTP again, something he'd once done in his life and stopped. SWIM began focusing on remembering his dreams, and went over the course of 3 nights from not being able to remember any dreams (before the trip, and hadn't remembered a dream for months before this. Those he did remember often were nightmares), to being able to write down a single line, to being able to write 11 pages about one dream. Following nights have been vivid as well. SWIM is now working on lucid dreaming, and has successfully purchased 10 doses of DMT in a dream, however did not get to the point of smoking it - the DMT looked off to SWIM and he was weary about smoking it (yes, even in his dream).
SWIM is looking for a few things from DMT-Nexus:
-Re-assurance through community. SWIM has no more DMT and will not likely have DMT again for some time. There are others here like SWIM, and I would really like to pass on the wishes of those people to SWIM.
-Knowledge and inspiration. SWIM knows that he has only begun a journey, and this forum is a tool, a guide he can use to help make that journey more successful.
-Coming full circle - contribution. SWIM is very serious about this. SWIM is aspiring to make DMT a large part of what drives his life - not necessarily in the regard that he wants it for himself - but more in the respect that he wishes for everyone to experience what he has. The beauty, incredible, indescribable. This is therapeutic, this is natural, and this is something every living being deserves to experience. One day, SWIM hopes to be able to contribute something big.
Thanks for reading, and thanks for being here.
LoneWanderer is a fiction author. He loves writing short stories about paranormal experiences. LoneWanderer uses the DMT-Nexus forum as an inspirational tool for his writing, and often posts writings about a character "SWIM," to stay consistent with the writing of many other forum users.
LoneWanderer doesn't endorse illegal activity, however, LoneWanderer also believes that no man should rule another.