The pleasure was entirely mine to read and answer. In your words I found consolation, even at some point I saw myself, and I learned many valuable advice from your words.
Are you Don Juan ? :=)
KannaRas wrote:thanks for taking the time to read and respond
IIYI wrote:
Almost every day I wonder if I'm awake or dreaming or tripping. Even at the risk of sounding odd. Sometimes I'm even afraid that my life may be a dream and I am afraid to wake up. Because sometimes, while I'm awake I have the feeling or think I'm tripping. I can not explain it, but sometimes it scares me. I can not tell this to my friends, even with those I trip with them sometimes because I know what their reaction will be.
i know how you feel about that
it is strange
assuming your saying you know what their reaction will be because youve tried befor
i can say myself that i have
and the usual reaction only leads one deeper into that rabbit hole
cause every usual reaction is like a dream construct has an error when your talking to him
lets take video game terms OOD like OUT OF DREAM like they say in role playing Out of characther
and then they break out and error and start spouting nonsense to make you feel strange about disscussing it
and even breaking down your own trust in what you know ?
like completley negating any further disscussion on what youve just dropped on the table
and yea ive wondered a few times
am i talking to an lets say NPC a None player characther or something
but its also possible
that simply they think and know
that disscussing these subjects can cause and bring in lots of confusion and they just want to avoid it ??
cant really say
maybe these questions are a way to see who you are talking to
you know
see if the person infront of you
has a capable thinking mind
or is a instinct drived human look alike
am i making any sense ?
Yes you have sense.
You are right, I've talked to my friends and I know their reaction. Some of them become violent anad aggressive. It's like getting into a zombie state. They do not start a discussion but an attack. They start shouting, nervous and escalating. And I told them something very calm. I've done it a few times, and the effect has been same.
At times I wonder if I'm not crazy or very crazy.
You are probably right about the question.
But something recently happened and I decided to continue to share with them, maybe the reaction may change over time. Or maybe i can learn more.
For now, I only see a welcome response from my wife, but she is my half soul. (my soulmate)
Аnd by one a particular friend but he may be even stranger than me
Or he is just more open mind than me.
Exclude people from the nexus. Here people have a very good attitude to me for which I thank them. As well as for support. Literally, the talk here is acting to me cures and learning.
KannaRas wrote:IIYI wrote:
Dreams:
I dream so strange dreams that sometimes I'm worried what I'm going to dream tonight. In fact, as I wake up, it's nice to have dreamed this, but before I fall asleep I worry slightly.
I get rid of the thought and after a while everything is fine, but I still think about what I'm going to dream tonight. Now I started to dream every night and every dream is strange even for sleep.
But things got together, and at one point the worry disappeared, telling myself that it would happen, what would happen and dream what I would dream. I just went down the stream. Now this worry is gone, and I feel much better, because I lie down and enjoy the moment. Both in waking states and in dreams.
im also there some nights
but i know first of all dreaming is a blessing
ive had long time periods where ive not dremt at all
and there used to be a time id had adventure dreams almost every night
and recently
spending soo much time in digital world
Video games , Nexus chat ect.ect.
i curropted my dreams
ive also noticed its not just that
but what is in you in the room
like if id keep my window open for flies and moths etc. to enter the room id know they would have the ability to enter my dreams aswell
cant explain how i got to this realisation but im pretty sure in my calculations
i started getting dreams of wall of texts like im chatting in the nexus chat while dreaming
and the synthethic feeling it gives while sleeping arr wa its a horror undescribable
and as much as i liked playing doom on PS4
id like to keep the running around with a gun and chain saw to the time i spend playing video games ya know ? hehe
im pretty sure i dident get a mod for my mind to download video games to
so i realised dreams are alot influenced by what we do in the time were walking around here in physical time i bet theres lots of reading material out there on dreams
im gald to hear you lost the worries and sleep well
even still theres always to learn and evolve in every direction all the time
what i realised so far
I believe you are right. Because your words are confirmed by my personal experience.
Everything affects sleep. Years ago, I've played a lot of computer games and that has had an effect on my sleep. (
It also affects what you think shortly before you fall asleep. Even in this way I can navigate my dreams if I think of something definite afterwards before to sleep, I see it in my dream, but I noticed that this is not very pleasant for myself. (other may feel other think) I prefer to dream something that I did not think of before, but just what a other part of my mind makes like to dream.
Like whether you ate recently or hours ago, and what you ate. I noticed that for me ibest reflects on me when my last meal is around Sunset. Which means a few hours (4-5-6) before I fall asleep. So I'm sleeping well and I believe that my body puts energy not to process the food but to do other processes - for example to dream.
Even what I eat has influence.
As the walk itself has influenced or intense work.
Even what I have used influences (whether I drank alcohol, whether I smoked grass, whether I smoked DMT or nothing).
Alcohol and grass block my dreams. I stop drinking before years or now i do it very very rearly and I do not even see pleasure in that. I rather do it so I do not look so crazy in people mind. (But even short time it stopped me from giving a damn for that too)
Years ago I was scared of my dreams. Because sometimes they come true.
I also sometimes saw "hallucinations" of events. For example in a wake state wile i am making a coffee (at that time I was still drinking coffee) i "hallucinate" "{how a stranger come to us and we sit down to eat}" and after 2 hours an unexpected stranger comes in home that I see for the first time in my life and have lunch together. (actually, it looks exactly the same way I had hallucinated) That at some point scared me a lot. Which motivates me to smoke grass nonstop because this "hallucinations" it stopped to pop up when I was smoking (even with 1 smoking they stop with weeks), but to be honest the smoking of the ganja was enjoying me too. It this events was years before I started using hallucinogens.
Now I have recently stopped smoking ganja again and dreaming has returned with full force, as occasionally these "appearances" are coming. The feeling of this "hallucinations" is as if I've already experienced it, and I know it, or it is like "somebody told" to me, but it is neither dreaming nor hallucinating. But call it a hallucination, but with a very real taste without distorted colors, patterns or fractals, but just like a normal part from a day.
An example of my grandmother (by father's mother) what she dreams always comes true. Even once she told my father that my sister would be born, and this happen in the same day that he understand that he will become father again and the not told anyone to my grandmother or to me. My grandmother was not seen them for months. She just call on the phone and tell him "Do you have anything to tell me? I'll have another granddaughter" ...and she even know that will have a grand(daughter)...
Something like that happened to me one evening dreaming my grandfather badly and I was shocked to worry I woke up at 5am (father of my mother) and my gradnfather died a few hours afterwards. (8:30 am the same morning)) I suffered greatly from his loss, even at one point in tranform to hate.But then I had otherconcepts about life and death. Now I'm calm about my grandfather.
I know a few people who do not take any drugs and are constantly in that state with dreams that come true, and they even feel afraid to fall asleep. They watch on this dreams like curse and have very problems with falling asleep because they are afraid.
But this with dreaming side and not dreaming side of the bed is very nice. I will try it an share it.
We perceive dreams as a blessing. It even gives me joy and I like to dream. Even when I dream scary, pleasant or different things in the morning, I feel very good when I'm awake. It's like sleeping relaxing more and give me energy, and at the same time I feel like I've had another life in my sleep. (something like i visit some other me for a moment in another dimention)
KannaRas wrote:
That's why I'm just trying to live my life and think less about "complex questions.". Maybe it is better to have no answer.
dont the lack of answers is what brings us to ask questions and be intruiged by how strange life is
and enjoy it and seek out stranger questions and come up with stranger sort of answers
i dont think nothing will ever be in stone as an answer i think we should try to keep inspiring each other to keep on and asking strange questions
imagine everyone in a state fully accepting what is how is and just rolling
and a state every one agrees they know everything and thats how it is and it is and just rolling
arent both equallly dangerous ?
now remove every one
and consider it just about yourself
i hope in no way what i said has come off ass offensive
its definatly not the intention like ive mentioned befor
Yes they are both equallly dangerous ?
But when i have 1 answer from it come out 101 more questions. And this brain storming is exhaust me because i start to chase next question... and so on. Now i am trying to simplify things and it loads me with energy .
I know that things are not simple at all, and that things are infinite or even put a figure it will be too big. I am small and can not think of such big things. It's easier form me to think about 1-2-3-5-8. And the answers to some questions go out without hunting them, as if they are climbing in front of me in unexpected places (for example in the garden), and I start laughing and laughing in laughter even a few tears of laughter appear... "Oh, that's how simple it was."
My friend you did not offend me with anything.
It is extremely enjoyable and I am delighted to have this dialogue.
I hope i did not offend you too and that you feel the same joy from this dialog.
P.P I really like your post and your signature
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Phylogeny repeats Ontogeny - IIYI