Shua wrote:I guess what im asking for is adcvie on how to learn and gain knowledge from these experiences since it feels like it was way more than i can grasp right now.
I think a lot of people feel the way you do about some of the things psychedelics reveal to us. It is so odd and weird and can be so hard to make heads or tails of some of these experiences. So don't feel alone in how you are feeling.
All in all it sounds like you created a pretty good set and setting. Surrounded by friends and the mood was good. I would concentrate on that! The rest will fall into place in time. You may find months from now that you aquire bits and pieces from that night. They fall into place. Call it what you may. Integration. Ephiphanies. Maybe just seeing it all a little clearer down the road a bit. I have found that many of my strong experiences made more sense later down the line.
I think about my first DMT experience every single day. I still have not truly grasped it. It has been years now. Still I am in awe of it all. Every time I go back I come back with a piece here and a piece there. It is a puzzle that cannot be solved. The only thing I can do is look at myself. In doing this I go deeper than before. I do it alone when I want to do this kind of WORK. I see that the puzzle is the illusion and that there is much more to this game of life. Don't try and grasp anything at all. Just allow it all to be and pay attention. Be in the moment. When that moment is over, go to the next, and to the next, with no comparison.
What are you trying to figure out? What are you trying to grasp?
If you want to use these substances to grasp what they have to offer then they must be approached in a sincere and respectful way. Think of it as work. Go into it expecting difficulties. Go into it with a desire to learn and grow. Recreational experiences are very fun but if you want to grasp more of the experience then think about this work approach sometime. It doesn't have to be all serious. Please try and enjoy the work. In the end, it is all for fun anyway!
Good Luck with your adventures! Not sure if this was the kind of information you were looking for but hey... there it is all the same!
Peace!!
"In the universe there is an immeasurable, indescribable force which shamans call intent, and absolutely everything that exists in the entire cosmos is attached to intent by a connecting link." ~Carlos Castaneda