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Blending reality after pure DMT Options
 
Meluzina
#1 Posted : 2/12/2019 1:35:36 AM

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Hello. I've been trying to search the internet to find an experience similar to SWIM's but couldn't which was somehow disturbing for me so I am writing this. If you've read anything similar somewhere, I would be very glad if you could redirect me there. This experience I am speaking about differs from those I find everywhere in these ways: 1) There were no concrete entities (at least not in the memory of SWIM) 2) There was no concrete place/space/universe where some plot would unfold 3) There was not enternal love 4) This was not the kind of 'I was in my room, but feeling kinda weird, feeling x, remembering y, being in the presence of z, in the room of a, but it looked all very colorful and I had interesting thoughts about it which I could judge because I knew I was a' experience. So it got confusing. Describing it is very artificial, me trying to make sense out of it very hard, since there were actually very little memories of it - and no wonder. That was not the way people think, there was not much opportunity to memorize since memories happen thanks to categorizing.
Yes, so basically, what happend in that story is that SWIM was trying to inhale as much as he could so he could have a breaktrough but probably didn't manage to do so since he found some rests in the pipe after. When he closed his eyes the reality started to blend. The categories he was used to started to collide into each other. Space, time, opposites - now, being aware the meaning is created by a location in the symbolic structure, that suggests that he was falling into a complete chaos. There was a dynamic in this process so there were still some principles but they got confused with each other like if everything was happening at the same time but all the possible time. He felt like the ocean fell on him when he closed his eyes. Like there were all the shapes and all the colors, like all that could be sorrowful and all that could be joyful was the same and the impresion of it was just that there was just too much of it, so it was all just monstrous. I concluded that all the joy of the world is all of the sudden not so much fun anymore when it happens at the same time. Especially if you cannot fully distinguish it from other things from which you could derive a meaning of it. It wasn't quite happening on the same plane as thoughts, there were rather feelings, impressions or how to say... I think there was probably some vision but cannot recollect anything concrete. But since there was still a progression this culminated into the final blend - there was more and more light and a feeling of some final peace that was promising and blissful - not joyful, that's something entirely different. And all of the sudden it all made sense but not that SWIM would think: "oh, so the answer to universe is x=y2+c", but a feeling that all the sorrow and all the joy find the meaning in the magnificence of pure being... But shortly before this final blend making it a united single dot..it stopped - and then, like it happend all over again and then, swim was back in his living room. SWIM felt overwhelemed.
Now, SWIM does understand why some people felt eternal love. However, SWIM has absolutely no idea where other people took their aliens. It's like they were speaking about some different drug. SWIM is also very fascinated by their ability to recollect a concrete place, entities and feelings they had (like fear) while claiming that happend to THEM after their ego-death because SWIM finds that contradictory. SWIM's own feelings or memories or basically sense of him was not even o topic, they were not in a question. It was not like SWIM would react to something... it was happening while noone including SWIM didn't take SWIM's existence into question... so SWIM would like to know if this happens to people before they meet their aliens? Or their pretty concrete vaccation? And why couldn't SWIM and up in different dimension but ended up in mashed potatoes?
Thank you all.
 

Good quality Syrian rue (Peganum harmala) for an incredible price!
 
Exitwound
#2 Posted : 2/12/2019 7:28:24 AM

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While there is a plenty of trip reports on the internet, seemingly having same motives or encounters/locations, it doesn't mean that all experiences are similar (or not).

What you encounter in hyperspace, is terribly hard to bring into the words, simply because there are no words or even concepts in our brain to express and describe them.

Even when we smoked with friends together, same spice, same location, our experiences would be different. Sometimes you get to meet entities/aliens, sometimes you just taken on a tour of spaces/rooms, sometimes you communicate, sometimes you are shown the door right away. Experiences can and will be very different.

Don't expect to get what you want from DMT, but rather you will get what you need. It's not like you can walk in into a hyperspace theater and order a show to your liking, but you always can ask.

Keep exploring and smoalk more!

(post about your further experiences here or have a diary, later you will be able to re-read and look at them from a different perspective in time.)
 
universeimpartial
#3 Posted : 2/12/2019 8:20:38 AM
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Every single time you go, it'll be a totally different experience. Sometimes meet entities, sometimes not. Sometimes see the door to the veil, sometimes go through it. Sometimes just shapes and weird patterns. EVERY single time I've had breakthroughs it has been different. That's what's so fascinating about it imo.
 
Meluzina
#4 Posted : 12/7/2019 9:05:01 PM

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It's been almost a year now and I am nowhere close to trying dmt again. I didn't mention it but frankly it was probably the scariest experience I've ever had. Nothing happend, no aliens dissecting me brain, no physical pain... It's just that seeing my world dissolve into this hideous bowl of mixed spagheti bolognese makes me sick every time I remember it. I wasn't a huge fan of living on earth but when I remember that, I am grateful that we have our reality, it seems pretty chill now. And regarding "you", when you dissolve you know it's like you've never been, like your human life is of equal significance and you are just a puppet of forces much bigger than you can imagine. It felt like we all have always been no one, just imagining we have a story of our life and we are the leading role here and we make pretty meaningful dicisions and take actions for a purpose, but well, sh.., no, it sort of happens without you knowing it and you are just trying to see meaning from 2 meters high where the meaningful picture starts to appear from 2000 above. And sh.. I just couldn't get to the white dot, no, no eternal love for this one.
It was not the first time I had dmt. The first time, it was so pretty, I was just seing my room being so pretty but I was very scared and then after another hit I was in this fractal, beautiful, colorful "space" and I felt like I am in some kind of control centre of me self and I made a wish and the whole atmosphere was very warm, loving and chill and I felt so happy afterwards. But even this memory doesn't outweight what happend after. And I can't make a sense out of it, I can't see what's new about it, like yep, pretty spooky, but what about it? If dmt was a person and purposly showed me this, I'd only say it probably seeks attention.
I just wonder, why do people do this like 30, 50, 100 times? What do they think they'll find?
 
Jega
#5 Posted : 12/7/2019 10:18:15 PM

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Meluzina wrote:
I wasn't a huge fan of living on earth but when I remember that, I am grateful that we have our reality, it seems pretty chill now.
I find it useful to judge a trip by what you took from it. Maybe that's just what you needed.
I read a report from a guy who was considering suicide for years. He tripped, lost his memory and believed he was looking at his own dead body having blown his head off with a shotgun. Horrible experience, but the upshot was he now values his life and would never consider suicide.

I believe there's always something positive to learn from even the most negative DMT experience.
 
Meluzina
#6 Posted : 12/7/2019 11:08:20 PM

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Thank you for the idea but... honestly this is basically information similar to 'hinding behind mom's skirt is pretty cozy' and let's say I somehow intuitively feel that it wasn't exactly 'the message'. Your suggestion seems logical, I know, but it doesn't feel right.
 
Jega
#7 Posted : 12/7/2019 11:32:22 PM

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Fair enough. I find DMT very intuitive, so it makes sense to trust yours. Just don't take everything you experience on DMT as a reality I guess is my main point.

What do you think was the message?
 
Meluzina
#8 Posted : 12/8/2019 12:04:47 AM

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Yeah... after that time it will sound like a pretty poor explanation but I think it had something to do with dualities and making a whole... kinda stuff. I feel like since then it's sort of easier to for me to look at things more... wholly? Not exactly quantum mechanics, I know.
 
Jega
#9 Posted : 12/8/2019 12:31:35 AM

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Don't underestimate the value of what you learned my friend. Plenty of people understand at least the basics of quantum mechanics, fewer have had such a profound experience as you have and improved themselves as a result.

Keep what you learned, and leave the rest. It was just 'an experience,' nothing more.
 
Meluzina
#10 Posted : 12/8/2019 12:39:23 AM

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Thank you, you're kind Smile But since I still don't feel like going for another journey, I assume there is something more for me to realize. I guess I should leave it some more time. Hopefully I'll see.
 
Jega
#11 Posted : 12/8/2019 2:24:36 AM

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Maybe there's something more you can realise, or maybe you would need another trip to realise it. I had a very scary DMT experience, then that experience (same theme) repeated on a subsequent two trips. Finally I realised I was scared to death and had to pull out the big guns and get some support, so I went on an Ayahuasca retreat. After deciding to ask for a second cup of medicine to get a stronger experience, I was back in the same hell I experienced on DMT. Was a difficult night, but the duration of the Ayahuasca trip allowed me to understand the lesson and come through it, whereas I don't think I would ever have got the time to do it with vaped DMT. I would have given up.
 
bismillah
#12 Posted : 12/8/2019 2:49:54 AM

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I never meet entities or fall into oceans of infinite love on my trips either. In fact, they can be quite somber or lonely in tone. Usually they fluctuate between "good" and "bad" as I explore what's going on in my life. When I listen to music, I may feel intense ecstasy. When I think back along my family tree and realize my immense responsibility to live my life the best I can, I'll feel a quiet determination. All on DMT. Different every time for every person.

I know what you mean when you say you see things "wholly", too. After I tripped a few times, I noticed that I could see myself in the third person and comment on myself in real time. Like, someone bumping in to me and causing me to drop what I'm carrying in a crowded hallway (for example) would previously have just made me angry, but now I would be able to see my emotions get the better of me and choose to not let it affect me (just an accident, no need to let it ruin your day). I think the experience gives us the ability to really dissect ourselves and choose our emotions.
I don't want comfort. I want God, I want poetry, I want real danger, I want freedom, I want goodness. I want a clever signature.
 
FranLover
#13 Posted : 12/8/2019 11:59:23 AM

Long live the world in peace, prosperity, and freedom from suffering


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Quote:
I just wonder, why do people do this like 30, 50, 100 times? What do they think they'll find?


The secret !

Also aliens.
Todo lo que quiero es que me recuerdes siempre así...amándote. Mantay kuna kayadidididi~~Ayahuasca shamudididi. Silence â—‹ Shiva â—‡ eternal Purusha.
What we have done is establish the rule of authority in silence. Silence is the administrator of the universe. In silence is the script of Natural Law, eternally guiding the destiny of everyone. The Joy of Giving ♡See the job. Do the job. Stay out of the misery.♡
May this world be established with a sense of well-being and happiness. May all beings in all worlds be blessed with peace, contentment, and freedom.
This mass of stress visible in the here & now has sensuality for its reason, sensuality for its source, sensuality for its cause, the reason being simply sensuality.
 
Exitwound
#14 Posted : 12/8/2019 4:32:34 PM

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Meluzina wrote:
Thank you, you're kind Smile But since I still don't feel like going for another journey, I assume there is something more for me to realize. I guess I should leave it some more time. Hopefully I'll see.


There are a lot of us (including me) who are on a long break from DMT. More than 1.5years have passed since my last strong experience. I've tried waters again with one 12mg dose around 2-3 months ago - spent whole trip pacing the room, trying to stay grounded asking not to be taken, I am not ready yet Smile

I learned two most valuable lessons, which still resonate with me and guide me in my life:
1) There is more to this existence than material world/reality
2) This reality is a very precious gift and we are privileged to experience it

Also I've been experimenting with less harsh and intense substances in the meantime and find them more pleasant for psychedelic explorations than the raw Mr. "come here, let me slap you in your face, you fool" Dimitri Smile
 
â—‹
#15 Posted : 12/8/2019 5:24:32 PM
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Exitwound wrote:


I learned two most valuable lessons, which still resonate with me and guide me in my life:
1) There is more to this existence than material world/reality
2) This reality is a very precious gift and we are privileged to experience it



This
 
bismillah
#16 Posted : 12/8/2019 8:49:17 PM

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If you're looking for a mellower, less "thrown in the cosmic washing machine" kind of experience, you can try smoking DMT with syrian rue. The rue makes the experience longer and a little softer, and gives you more control over the strength of the experience by giving you more time to inhale.

Alternatively you can dissolve your spice in a shot of lemon juice and drink that with harmalas for a markedly calmer journey.
I don't want comfort. I want God, I want poetry, I want real danger, I want freedom, I want goodness. I want a clever signature.
 
Eaglepath
#17 Posted : 12/9/2019 2:06:51 PM

I rather root my values in my own hallucinations than in society´s neurotic illusions..


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Exitwound wrote:
Meluzina wrote:
Thank you, you're kind Smile But since I still don't feel like going for another journey, I assume there is something more for me to realize. I guess I should leave it some more time. Hopefully I'll see.


There are a lot of us (including me) who are on a long break from DMT. More than 1.5years have passed since my last strong experience. I've tried waters again with one 12mg dose around 2-3 months ago - spent whole trip pacing the room, trying to stay grounded asking not to be taken, I am not ready yet Smile

I learned two most valuable lessons, which still resonate with me and guide me in my life:
1) There is more to this existence than material world/reality
2) This reality is a very precious gift and we are privileged to experience it

Also I've been experimenting with less harsh and intense substances in the meantime and find them more pleasant for psychedelic explorations than the raw Mr. "come here, let me slap you in your face, you fool" Dimitri Smile


Im at some similar status here.. Chewing Salvia is great as a "non slap in your face" during the "holiday time" Smile
"Too cute to live, too cozy to die" - Eaglepath
 
Meluzina
#18 Posted : 12/13/2021 10:37:09 PM

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2.5 years. I think I got it. And I've heard a calling. I was surprised. I answered with a small dose, I was in the fractal space and it was very pleasant (I mean in it's weird way). It was like being reunited. I will probably try a few sub-breakthrough doses to feel myself into it and if the gods are in favour, I'll try to do it again.
 
Voidmatrix
#19 Posted : 12/13/2021 11:40:59 PM

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Sounds like you got thrown into one of the rougher kinds of paradoxical planes that DMT can take us too.

You're not alone. I've had weird experiences like that. That's why I went on a six year break years ago. Even now, sometimes it's hard to approach.

DMT always has something new to show you.

Meluzina wrote:
I just wonder, why do people do this like 30, 50, 100 times? What do they think they'll find?


Again, it always has something new to show you Very happy

I also like "reminders."

Meluzina wrote:
SWIM is also very fascinated by their ability to recollect a concrete place, entities and feelings they had (like fear) while claiming that happend to THEM after their ego-death because SWIM finds that contradictory.


How so? The ego dies, everything else is still there. It's as though without the ego one gains a particular indifference to themselves. It's also a kind of paradox state (I know you wrote that part a couple years ago, and your views may have changed, so you can ignore this question if you like, I was simply curious as to your reasoning).

We can bring analytical thinking into the space, but it will only get one so far. It's very much an intuitive process.

Meluzina wrote:

2.5 years. I think I got it. And I've heard a calling. I was surprised. I answered with a small dose, I was in the fractal space and it was very pleasant (I mean in it's weird way). It was like being reunited. I will probably try a few sub-breakthrough doses to feel myself into it and if the gods are in favour, I'll try to do it again.


Good! I find sub-breakthroughs underrated and oh so valuable. I do sub-breakthroughs and lower more often than not. Though when they want to take me they do...

And in my experience, when called, regardless of how I'm feeling, if I follow through, it's always good Smile

Exitwound wrote:
I learned two most valuable lessons, which still resonate with me and guide me in my life:
1) There is more to this existence than material world/reality
2) This reality is a very precious gift and we are privileged to experience it


Was my thinking after my first time as well.

Let us know how everything goes, Meluzina. And reach out if needed. You have support here.

Love

One love
What if the "truth" is: the "truth" is indescernible/unknowable/nonexistent? Then the closest we get is through being true to and with ourselves.


Know thyself, nothing in excess, certainty brings insanity- Delphic Maxims

DMT always has something new to show you Twisted Evil

Question everything... including questioning everything... There's so much I could be wrong about and have no idea...
All posts and supposed experiences are from an imaginary interdimensional being. This being has the proclivity and compulsion for delving in depths it shouldn't. Posts should be taken with a grain of salt. 👽
 
Meluzina
#20 Posted : 12/18/2021 5:53:48 PM

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Voidmatrix wrote:


Good! I find sub-breakthroughs underrated and oh so valuable. I do sub-breakthroughs and lower more often than not. Though when they want to take me they do...

One love


Jesus freaking Christ. Being the natural P**** I trully am, I again had a teeny-tiny dose and again, being in that fractal space... You guys, this must be probably laughable for those that can really do it, but this feels so sweet. I feel so terribly anxious before I do it and I have no idea why because while I'm doing it, it's such a bliss. I have that with all psychedelics, until I pass a certain border I'm like, nope this is not for me anymore, too unprepared, didn't do enough meditation, too young, too old, too I don't know what-ever, and when I pass it I'm like, jesus please don't let me go. I can feel my earthly existence drifting away from me and I feel light. That feeling of truth, of realness, of LIFE and power and all the beauty and all the terror and you are completely naked before it and it's ALIFE and it's so intoxicating. It feels a little bit erotic by the way. My impression, just saying. Again, me total newbie speaking after like 10 mg you know Drool Thumbs up Jesus christ I know, I know, cannot know until I do it properly, but even this is so impressive to me. And I think this is a way to go for me, to have a mild dose and when I'm in that state of sweet confusion and awe and gratitude, then do more, not like I did it the first time I tried through, head against the wall, I can do that when I grow up... By the way, I tried like a week ago and I was physically not able to do it, I had three lighters and they kept failing until I wasted what I had there to a light buzz in the head... and today, I could, today is the full moon, like it was a month ago when I could, so I think I might consider that next time
 
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