PRE-CONDITIONS(mind)Set: meditative, peaceful, open, happy, carefree
(physical condition) Set: healthy, awake, calm
Setting (location):Home, safe secure peaceful, much of trip in back yard or front yard where I have gardened and feel bonded to the inhabitants/plant/animal/insects/ect
time of day: 7:30pm light but approaching sunset within a few hours, into a clear night fullmoon,
recent drug use: no meds, ate very small harvested mushroom bits the day(s) before
last meal: was planning to do the trip the following day after a fast and meditaion but felt really good so did it after basically eating whatever(various stuff) after work healthy and treats
PARTICIPANTGender: female
body weight: 133lbs
known sensitivities: I'm sensitive to everything but no allergies or what ever except being sensitive - cumin the herb knocks me out,(this probably isn't the intention of the question
)
history of use: first real trip on anything, I have chewed rue seeds a few times(5-6) just to get acquainted) had weed twice but just got hungry and a bit to in touch with lower vibes of others,
BIOASSAYSubstance(s): Psilocybe cubensis
Dose(s): 21g wet then an hour later another 5g wet
Method of administration: ate fresh just on their own
EFFECTS[/u]
Administration time: T=7:30 21g wet
Duration: felt nothing but a bit uplifted
First effects: felt nothing but a bit uplifted
Administration time: T=8:30 5g wet
Duration: 10 hours?
First effects: vision went to tilt shift, enchanter forest aka awesome
Peak: after 1h - hour 6
Come down:like being rebirthed into seperation sucked!
Intensity (overall):2
Evaluation / notes: I have no idea how to evaluate how far I went. I would actually appreciate insight on this as I know I would like to explore further but don't know where I was so am not sure where my aim should be. Beautiful experience though. I would have stayed if I could have.
OPTIONALPleasantness: 4
Implesantness: only having to leave
Visual Intensity: 1? nothing to compare it to
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AFTER-EFFECTSHangover: head ache fatigue, was pretty useless the next day, but didn't really get much sleep, and was likely dehydrated
Afterglow: not sure yet I am only on my second day out
REPORTSo trip report.
It was great but LONG 7:30-5am when I woke up I was still tripping, 10 hours.
I started with 21g wet no nausea and I kinda liked the taste. After an hour I felt nothing but a bit of elevated mood so added another 5g wet. That put me into a trip level I cannot gage via the scale but I really got what I needed out of it. Though I would like to go deeper on another trip.
I will preface that I am a daily meditator and by that I mean I attempt to stay in the flow without inner dialogue most of every day, so I had no thoughts just observations, and insights through the process, I basically became an observer, but it was like seeing things for the first time.
Colours were NOT hightened, no patterns, or fractals, I was totally "with it" and able to make good decisions but what I did get was pretty great.
It started out that I saw everything from a new perspective. It was almost like tilt shift photography. Enchanted forests now make sense to me. Someone ate a mushroom. Everything was incredibly beautiful.
I could easier see the space between objects so everything seemed more 3D like in a theater impossibly 3d. It reminded me of how they tell you in art classes that a tree looks very different than we draw them. It isn't a green cloud shape with a trunk. I don't know if that makes sense but I finally saw the trees as they are.
It was/is so beautiful that I spent 3 hours standing beside a tree. Laughing then crying.:laugh: Then I went and sat by another tree and was just stunned at the bark and how it's branches reached out like arms sheltering/embrasing everything below it. I sat with that tree a while till my sitter thought I was being a bit to obviously mesmerized to people walking by so I returned to the first tree.
Oh actually in the inbetween I sat in the long grass and watched a june bug trying to fly. It was fascinating. I have always been so squeamish of them but it SUCKED at flying.
I felt really bad for it as it had obviously had the junebug equivalent of to many oreo cookies so when it climbed up the blade of grass to take flight from the top like the other june bugs the grass would bend and tip over. After a while I held the grass straight for the poor super challenged dude and so he got to the top but then had no clue what to do with his wings he just spread them out and nothing happened while all his little peers flew away. I had never considered the difficulty facing a young june bug before and I was humbled.
So back to my tree I just sat down in the dirt for at least another hour maybe
two and had returned to that bliss I found there before. More laugh/cry.
Laugh because all my life since I was 4 I have been saying I want to go home without really understanding what even I meant. I just knew this life wasn't home. Well I found home. Under that tree the veil breaking on the mushroom foreshadowed what I can only describe as the veil of separation breaking.
I was home. I was without fear, or isolation, I was one again with everything.
Then the cry would start because I knew this return "home" would only last 5-6 hours. The tears were the feeling of homesickness before leaving home again.
Thankfully my sitter reminded me I could come back so I then laughed so hard and I quote the sitter "I thought you were broken".
So germ phoebe me(took way to much microbiology in school) sat in the dirt, and actually sat on an old dog marrow bone and didn't care. The realization that these fears are all just ideas took held and nothing was gross, or scary. While the bugs were eating my sitter they just sat on me or left me alone. I enjoyed so fully being in this state of home, without the mind reminding me of my separateness.
The phrase going out of your mind I now see as quite positive.
While sitting there I realized and said to creation if this is crazy I want to stay.
All through this I was totally visible to my neighbors and realized how funny it would look to see someone standing or sitting beside a tree for such an extended time and it again made me laugh because I had found the secret of this pleasure while it would simply look to weird to a sober person to even be there with a tree for 10 minutes.
My nose ran like I have never experienced, not to be gross but it was like those 3 year old kids with non stop snots. I actually asked my sitter for their shirt so I could wear it and use mine as a handkerchief. So my one questionable choice was changing my shirt on my deck in clear view of the neighbors but it was dark and I'm not a huge fan of clothes anyways so I'd still not blame the shrooms to much for that.
The hard part was coming out. It lasted hours and it hurt emotionally because it felt like being rebirthed back into the state of seperation. The experience was totally worth it but I am going to wait a bit to do it again as I can't yet face that transition back to regular awareness and leaving that oneness behind.
I fell asleep early morning but woke up a few hours later still tripping and I started to forget to breath. That actually why I kept waking up. Sleep apnea kind of thing though I don't have it when sober I was gasping myself awake.
Oh I need to add the funniest part. Every time I would start to get sad or head down a sad path while talking to my sitter if it got to dark it was like the mushrooms didn't want me going there so a crazy mechanical laugh would rip through me and change my course back to happy. I felt very much like I was being taken care of and it was a great though some how tiring experience.
One psychological insight came after hours of crazy laughter and some tears my face was quite swollen. Unrecognizable to myself I realized everything else to me was beautiful but in the mirror all I could see was a hideous monster.
That hurt and while sober I think I am quite healthy minded, I know I am not ugly I get attention without trying but obviously in the subconscious there is a block that wouldn't allow me to see the perfection in myself that I saw in everything and everyone else.
Today I felt a headache and a bit hung over but that could have been dehydration from the nonstop leaky nose.
I would like to explore further and with dmt containing plants, I am currently growing Hawaiian baby woodrose, salvia concolour, blue morning glory, peyote(babies) and have quite a bit of rue on hand.
I'm not sure if it would be best to just work with one plant at a time or what. Advice and insight appreciated.
Thanks