It is like DMT calls to you. I have had thoughts just pop in my head to do it and I do. During these experiences where I acted on a whim, just a quick thought, a quick pull, like something is saying that they do indeed have something to show you, I always experienced a feeling of joy and peace. No fear or trepidation. It's an odd feeling when it comes. Unlike any pull towards anything I can think of.
I guess that was my way to get over fear. When I experience fear before a trip I do not let it stop me. I figure, screw it, face it head on. I have had difficult experiences going into it like this but I do not regret facing it. Can't all be puppy dogs and kittens.
I like the contrast. I like that I have experienced the difficult and the positive with DMT. It is a more rounded lesson plan. What I think is that it is all illusion. The positive can distract from what is really going on just as much as the difficult. Terror and fear are difficult, it's a distraction, it's not real. The positive is the same to me. A distraction and not real.
I can't really say why I feel this way. It's hard to put my finger on it. I just feel like it's all the same thing. As soon as the labels are applied it becomes something else. It must be observed fully and totally every time. Total acceptance of what is occurring, no matter what it is. Not having a preference. That is what I have now, no preference. And with this attitude I have gleaned more of a lesson for myself.
That said I will use DMT planned or unplanned. I will accept anything that comes.
During my planned visits to hyperspace I enjoy a certain atmosphere. I like to put on music without lyrics. I like to smudge myself and my environment with white sage. I don't believe in spirits or anything, I just like the smell and ceremony and mental preparation. I like to trip at night with very little light, a couple candles someplace safe. I set intentions during meditation for about 30 mins and go for it.
I get called much less often anymore. I visit hyperspace maybe four times a year now. I don't want to pester the teacher. I come when the teachers calls or is it when the student is ready the teacher appears. Either way, communication is occurring. Something is being taught. That is how I approach DMT, as a classroom.
Pay attention and be respectful is my only rule. This attitude has improved the quality of my DMT experiences. It has improved many aspects of my real life as well. The lessons we learn there are to be applied here and vice versa. It's all connected.
"In the universe there is an immeasurable, indescribable force which shamans call intent, and absolutely everything that exists in the entire cosmos is attached to intent by a connecting link." ~Carlos Castaneda