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brilliantlydim
#1 Posted : 5/16/2016 1:03:53 AM

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Last visit: 19-May-2019

PRE-CONDITIONS
(mind)Set: Generally good, definitely nervous
(physical condition) Set: Relatively feeling good
Setting (location): Beautiful hut beside a lagoon in central america
time of day: (12 or 24 hour system, daylight? starlight? overcast?) Noonish
recent drug use: (list also any kind of medication) Alcohol 2 days prior
last meal: (Time and type) light mixture of fresh fruit

PARTICIPANT
Gender: (m / f) M
body weight: (in kg pls) 80
known sensitivities: None
history of use: (experienced, novice, first timer - in general and for this specific substance/form) First time having psychedelic experience

BIOASSAY

Substance(s): (list all taken substances) Bufo Alvarius Toad Venom sun dried
Dose(s): (in the same order as Substances pls, use metric system i.e. g/ mg/ �g) approx 100mg
Method of administration: (dissolved in water, capsuls, insufflated, vaporized...) smoked in oil burner


EFFECTS

Administration time: T=0:00 (expand this if you used delayed administration for multiple substances or the same substance with multiple doses. Use indices.) 1 min to inhale all the smoke
Duration: (x hours) 17 mins total
First effects: 3 secs after holding all the smoke in my lungs
Peak: (estimate a time range and note as e.g. T=2:00-4:00 for a range of 2 hours beginning 2 hours after administration) anywhere from 10 secs after lift off till a few seconds from comedown
Come down: 16 mins in
Baseline: 18 mins

Intensity (overall): (use HRS-like scale i.e. 0-4: 0 = "Not at all;" 1 = "Slightly;" 2 = "Moderately;" 3 = "Quite a bit;" 4 = "Extremely."Pleased
Evaluation / notes:4

OPTIONAL
Pleasantness: (0-4)4
Implesantness: (0-4)4
Visual Intensity: (0-4) 2
.
.
.


AFTER-EFFECTS

Hangover: (0-4 ; what type of impleasantness ; duration)0
Afterglow: (0-4 ; what type of positive effects ; duration)4

REPORT



Here is the best description I have been able to come up so far of my first experience with an entheogen. It was the venom from the Bufo Alvarius Toad, and it was just over a year ago. Please remember that what I write is just words, and the experience was really something magnitudes greater than what I could ever hope to illustrate through text.

As I inhaled the smoke I felt my lungs filling to capacity.   I didn’t know how much more I could take in but somehow I kept inhaling.  Completely focused on taking in as much as I could I forgot about everything else completely.  Finally the pipe was taken away from my lips and I began to feel my body literally dissolve along with the world around me.  I could hear the counting down from 10 start and it reminded me of the instructions we had went through just before.   I started to see a swirling geometric pattern come to towards me, or me to it.  The colours were deep with red in the centre, then in layers moving towards the outside, yellow, green, blue, violet then silver around the outside.  

The sound of my guides counting brought me back, 3…2…  I remember feeling anxious about it for an instant, but then fully knowing what was happening and why and being able to let go of my fear.  My focus left the physical realm again.   I was moving through things at a tremendous amount of speed. I felt like I had traversed the universe in an instant,  and was now passing many levels of what could be described as higher dimensional planes.  

I experienced for a period what I could only describe as pure chaotic insanity that would have been the essences of unadulterated terror,  had the feeling not been that of a complete and unbridled freedom.  It was exhilarating at an intensity and depth impossible to articulate by even a fraction of a degree.

I remember colour engulfing all and comprising the space I was in, lots of movement, unfolding, stretching, compressing and expanding.  Then I was intertwined with the spirit of a man on the same journey as me.  He was launching from a different time and place, an ancient tribal ritual in the jungle far in the past.  His face was painted, he wore a head dress, it was night time and we were one and the same, in the same place, experiencing the same thing.  I felt his connection to the earth, it was strong.  I felt raw primal power radiate through me.  It was so intense and magnificent.

Then I was gone from there, going farther, moving so fast, I was nothing but my naked soul.  Bodiless, just the pure energy of me.  I was moving so fast towards something.  Up, but not up in a physical sense away from the ground, but so far up that the earth, universe, the realms beyond didn't exist anymore.  So far up that existence ceased to exist.  Pure, infinite nothing.  Traveling at an infinite speed, through infinite nothing when time doesn't exist.  Through it in an instant and an eternity.  

I broke through some sort of barrier, a veil, or a transition to someplace different and even farther away.  Thats when I encountered the infinite power.  I heard and felt a vibration that shook apart, disintegrated and assimilated every particle of the form that was left of I.  I was gone, now one with the infinite light, energy, power, love, and intelligence of the universe. Perfection, pure perfection.  I became pure consciousness, unfiltered, all encompassing. 

I came back so fast, back to this material, space and time plane.  It seemed to move with a lack of fluidity and slow.  Jagged pieces of time trying to fit together like misaligned and misfit rotating cogs,  clumsy and inefficient.  Pieces of me started coming back together, I started to recall this universe, the earth, myself.  Thoughts were infinitely slow.  I remember pondering if this was stuck in a "time freeze" that I had read about. I seemed stuck there for a while, time was not familiar.  

Then a joke.  Some kind of game of hide and seek.  It was so funny and I was completely amused, like a child playing peek a boo.  I remember laughing, but dam if I could remember why.  

And just like that I was back, staring at the wall.  I looked over at my kind guide who was sitting on the other end of the hut, head down in his hands.  He raised his head and gave me a look, neither of us had to say a word.  I told him I was back, and he gave me a slow nod of the head.  

Immediately after I felt incredible.  I was light and completely energized in every cell of my body.  I felt all stress, fear, anxiety had completely vanished from my body.  I stood up and felt like I could float. I was as light as air, and had pure energy pulsing through my cells.
 

Live plants. Sustainable, ethically sourced, native American owned.
 
TGO
#2 Posted : 5/16/2016 1:50:57 AM

Music is alive and in your soul. It can move you. It can carry you. It can make you cry! Make you laugh. Most importantly, it makes you feel! What is more important than that?

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Last visit: 04-Sep-2023
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Thanks for sharing, Ehud!

Sounds like you had quite the transformative experience! This is one area of psychedelia I have yet to explore but hope to sometime in the future. Keep calm and carry on friend!

Much peace and love!
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roninsina
#3 Posted : 5/16/2016 8:22:43 AM

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Posts: 401
Joined: 31-May-2014
Last visit: 30-Dec-2023
Location: The confluence
Great report ehud!

I was shopping for a toad when I stumbled upon the Nexus. I had abandoned the idea, but your experience seems to share all the characteristics of others reports, from elsewhere and here on the Nexus, that sparked my initial interests. I may have to resume my search.

Thank you for the inspiration.
"We dance round in a ring and suppose,
while the secret sits in the middle and knows." Robert Frost

 
brilliantlydim
#4 Posted : 5/16/2016 3:33:31 PM

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Posts: 431
Joined: 13-Jun-2015
Last visit: 19-May-2019
roninsina wrote:
Great report ehud!

I was shopping for a toad when I stumbled upon the Nexus. I had abandoned the idea, but your experience seems to share all the characteristics of others reports, from elsewhere and here on the Nexus, that sparked my initial interests. I may have to resume my search.

Thank you for the inspiration.


I would suggest one should not support the capture and confinement of these animals either by doing it them selves or purchasing them from others that do it.

I have it from a personal friend that works close with these little guys that their numbers are noticeably declining in recent years due to the trafficking of them in the interest of having a venom supply. They can be caught and milked of their venom and released without harm to them, there are instructions on the net on how to do this. There are people that are doing this, and I suggest only supporting people that harvest the venom in a responsible, humane, and renewable manner.

Other than that, if you have the calling definitely go for the experience. I know of a couple of Dr's in Mexico that work with the medicine and that was the route I had went. For me it was the right way to go. Set and setting were perfect and having someone there to guide with a great deal of experience with the medicine was highly beneficial and helped facilitate a perfect experience in one shot.

 
roninsina
#5 Posted : 5/16/2016 8:32:43 PM

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It was my understanding (or misunderstanding) that most Sonoran toads for legal sale in the US were captive bred. In any case, by the time I built what I would consider an adequate habitat, it would probably require far less personal resources to visit a healer in Mexico, as you say. It also sounds as if the spirit behind holding the animal captive would, maybe rob from the experience. It would probably be some considerable time before I could realistically pursue such an endeavor, anyway.

I would also imagine, based on your report and that of others, it's not something I would need a ready supply of unless I planned to initiate others. One, or certainly a small handful of experiences, in a lifetime sounds more than adequate.

Again, thank you for the inspiration. And thanks for the reminders, of course.Thumbs up
"We dance round in a ring and suppose,
while the secret sits in the middle and knows." Robert Frost

 
brilliantlydim
#6 Posted : 5/16/2016 11:18:02 PM

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Posts: 431
Joined: 13-Jun-2015
Last visit: 19-May-2019
roninsina wrote:

I would also imagine, based on your report and that of others, it's not something I would need a ready supply of unless I planned to initiate others. One, or certainly a small handful of experiences, in a lifetime sounds more than adequate.



Yes, I would agree with that.
 
 
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