I just wrote this to a friend, but share it here too.

In my meditations I do put intention for consciousness throughout, in general.
It has become a reason to do the praxis, It feels like I'm not that much obsessed anymore to be far-out just for the sake of it.

In a way I start to feel responsible for putting out intentions, ones that are state-of-being.
No hollow words for betterment reciting, but feeling to dictate or write to codex of the future.
Not like "I wish this or that", but really bonking it up deep into the system.
It does not goes or happen with words, any thought can happen but that feels peripheral only.

If it's in vain, then it is, but can't stop just doing it, as if I do have something to "say" not in words.
Creating a feedback loop of sorts, with "feel", like uploading/downloading a "state".
There is no mind-captive communication, just connection and a "flow".
Like going on-line and it goes automatic from there and the intends are the frequency used.

I do not expect any seen result, like I do not need that proof, this confident.
Without this confidence I feel like it devalue the intentions (state) set out/received.
I notice result in myself and surroundings though.
All coincidence, self lie? Idk, it works.

It has nothing whatsoever to do with power or level or prestige or pride, like all that emotional connotations could only devalue intention potential.

It gives me purpose.

Usually this phase happens at the oh-crap deep peak, giving meaning why to be there.
Besides it, there is room for enjoyment or fear etc but that feels circumstantial only.
At come down it's playground time, personal delight, the dessert.
The pattern wasn't always like this, and might change.

I probably failed to express this little testimony accurately,
just a cheer chatty attempt