I have been drawn to the psychedelic experience ever since finishing high school. I started out with weed, then ecstasy. I did my research on acid before I tried it, read everything I could on Erowid. It took me awhile to find it, but I was introduced by a friend one night where we drove to a beach and melted into paradise at the edge of the universe. Afterwards I had many experiences with it changing my view of how awesome the world could be.

I suffered from depression and suicidal thoughts for quite some years but it all changed when I started my spiritual journey. It began after reading "A New Earth" by Eckhart Tolle. Prior to this I hadn't known much about the ego and it's games but it all made sense after reading that book. I became aware of my ego and this changed my life for the better.

I started looking at things without trying to label them (which was terribly hard at first) but I remembered what it was like on acid, how you see the true beauty and vibrancy of things. I think this paired with a scientific appreciation for the pure odds of us being here and an appreciation for the fact we are all a continuous movement/interchange of energy made up of zillions of particles... just blew my mind. And gave me such an appreciation for every little thing that existed. I now stop to look at the pavement, flowers, scenery, everything! It's all amazing.

I realised it's up to us how we view the world. We can see it for what it is or simplify everything by labeling and naming. I saw how we aren't separate from anything, it's just we've been conditioned to think so and our ego would like to think so. We are what we see, when we aren't clouded by ego can feel the essence of what is essentially us, we are the universe experiencing itself. Within us there is infinite space. Now I look at everything in awe and amazement, and joy to have the precious experience.

I also started meditating around this time and had an appreciation for its benefits but I didn't have the mental stamina to keep this up. Only recently did I start in earnest to do it daily for 10 minutes. The results have been amazing. I reach very calm states and even see brief visions. The recurrent theme has been an eye which opens and closes behind a veil of pink and green colour. I never knew things like this could be achieved even without drugs. But I do it to better myself and hopefully soften my ego.

Which brings me to DMT. In the past I was always keen but knew I wasn't ready. My general attitude was that of, that stuff is too crazy, not going to mess with that. Only after I had begun my daily meditation did the possibility of the substance coming to me come around. It was then I did some more research and I knew I was ready to take the next step in my spiritual journey. And as I wrote in my trip report I was blown away! I experienced the impossible, became connected to the source. If only it was easier to recall everything, as it fades so quickly. I am grateful for that experience, life changing it was indeed.

Glad to have you here rainbow-dragon! Looking forward to reading your report on your first hyperspace experiences. You'll find that you've just scratched the surface by coming here.

Thank you vardlokkur! Most definitely, I spent a lot of time reading here before my trip, so glad this community exists!

Welcome home brother dragon

Welcome to the Nexus rainbow-dragon. It sounds like you're on the right path.

Peace

Macre

Thanks Moondance and Macre! Certainly do feel welcome

I guess another thing I'd like to mention are my difficult, or rather downright bad experiences with acid. Like many people say, coming out of difficult trips can teach you a lot about yourself and you come out for the better. The main one was caused out of stupidity on my part (this was years ago, I was young) I took 2 alone thinking they would be weak but I realised they weren't. In less than 10 minutes my arms were trailing and I was really scared about what was coming and don't ask me why but I had the last one, it tasted like sugar melting in my mouth.

I thought the safest thing to do would be to lie down and try to sleep, and I think I did pass out for some time but I woke up with no recollection and I thought I had died. Unfortunately I blew out a candle because I thought it was the safe thing to do but then I thought I was on fire, I left the house thinking I had set it on fire, and my mental resistance was so strong it just fuelled it on. I experienced being burnt alive, I turned into a sizzling piece of meat. I won't go into all the details but it was as close to a living hell as I could imagine.

The other time was not nearly so intense but I was coming up on what was a good trip (2 tabs) and my friend made me really upset and cry. Almost instantly all over the room appeared 50 or so huge black cockroaches which appeared and then fell, I could feel them in my hair and down my back which I kept brushing off with my hands. At the same time from a single point across the room black lines began coming towards me, like the cracks in a mirror. My friend realised his mistake and took me outside and it took awhile but it turned around and I had a great time after.

Acid in a way brings out our subconscious to reality and the positive or negative energy that we generate. And I think it shows us just what we create in ourselves when we have negative emotions and resistance. To me it showed how we are the ones who create negative emotions much of the time it is unnecessary, it is generally caused by resistance of a situation when acceptance is the key. After coming through that I was rattled but stronger as a person.

I also had a bad trip (on mushrooms) a little more than a few years ago which caused me to become afraid, in a way, of doing them again. It was difficult to accept what was happening and caused great fear. i'm a pretty strong minded person but all that did was cause me to just sit motionless while extremely scared and thinking i would never come down. After I started to slide off the peak i felt better and was able to enjoy the last half hour or so.

Since then I have prepared my mind and tried them twice. I feel more ready to handle large doses again without freaking out. I think i could work my way out of a bad situation better, my mind is more at ease then it was back then.

Glad to hear you're mind is more at ease anrchy! I was also quite dubious about high doses for awhile but starting small definitely helped.

Thank you for this introduction, rainbow dragon. Very well thought and written. (and experienced of course

I even ordered A New Earth, the ego is something I'm working on with mushrooms a lot and this book seems right on target !

And about the DMT experience... I just started myself, seems there's a lot to be found in there too. I'll be happy to read more about your travels in hyperspace

Welcome Silly(c)One! Good to hear! It's a great book, really opened my eyes in many ways. Wish you the best with your work