This was posted in the intro essay area, but this seemed more like the right place.
Good Morning,
Last night, something happened. SWIM weighed out .017g and loaded the GVG. SWIM took one small hit and put the pipe down. The normal low dose buzz set in and SWIM closed my eyes and lay back in my arm chair and wait until it slows down. After a few minutes, SWIM reach for the GVG again and proceed to take the biggest hit I've taken. As SWIM exhaled, SWIM put the pipe between my ankles and sat back. And then it happened. SWIM was in a room of white/pink opalescent space that was unfamiliar in that I'd never seen it before, but at the same time it wasn't unfamiliar. I recall seeing an "eye" transposed as moving wallpaper over the surface of everything and peppermint pinwheels spinning into the infinite. SWIM remember feeling the point where my body wasn't a concern and that I had merged with the universe. I felt like I was not an I, but a One of All. It was a fleeting moment that I didn't want to subside. My fear of death was taken care of in a split second of truth. SWIM realized that my body is just a vessel that can and will be destroyed as it is only a temporary space for my (this) energy to inhabit and animate. I know when I die, that it is only my body and that my energy will not be lost. It was a very reassuring feeling to know that this life is just one stop on the cosmic tour of infinite spaces. Religion was the theme of the descent and I recall being aware of my body again, hands in the common praying position and mumbling "This is what Sunday should be." I was raised Catholic, went to Catholic School as a child and stopped going at 14. I was not expecting a religious theme in all of this, but It was made clear to me that, that was truth, religion in itself is for the masses,a great guide for people to live by and find comfort in, but it is not the absolute truth. This was a remarkable event for me and I am very grateful to experience it. I know this is just the beginning of new relationship to myself and the world I live in. I will try a bigger dose next time as I am baby stepping my way through this experience.