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Dance with Madness and Harmony Options
 
NoBody
#1 Posted : 11/30/2011 3:48:58 AM
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Last visit: 29-Dec-2011
A close friend of mine just delved into pharma for the first time. He realizes this place has a template for reports, but is rather uninterested in all that, so this is what he has to say:


" Before I delve into a strange experience, let me first begin by articulating several others occurred during my dance with a strange host. I read so many reports about other's experiences with this same host and, strangely, I fail to relate in any way to them after several encounters. Prior to this event, my encounters have been what I can only describe as a "true vision." I imagine those who have seen can relate, but I will attempt to explain to those who haven't. I often read of kaleidoscopes and multi-colored patterns. I see something akin to that, but it isn't random or meaningless. It's in the walls, in the air, strings resonating infinitely into one another, spiraling eternally. I don't encounter "beings," personally, rather a sense of "being." I see the fabric of the universe resonating through the world around me, spiraling continuously to create everything and nothing all the same. I've never gone beyond that, gone past the true vision.


I've seen more; more distinct spirals, of infinite colors and infinite dimensions; an n-helix with unbounded proportions, speaking, moving, changing. Nothing recognizable or truly describable in worldly terms, really. But, at the same time, somewhat familiar. Patterns everywhere, the spirals appearing all around, all my experiences have been the same. That is, until this one.
Prior to this experience, I've only encountered a gaseous giant engulfing my mind. A brief encounter, really; no more than 5 or 6 minutes being entirely seized. My mind has traveled depths of madness and beyond; truly, fear is not something it knows no longer. As a side note, it should be interesting to hear that my mind is rather pure; a life devoid of alcohol, drugs (besides this), and other such devices. I cannot claim to draw upon the experiences of a wide range of mind altering substances because I do not have such experiences. Yet, the spirit gasses consuming me; no, it never compared to the realms I've delved into in sleep and dreams and contemplation. Perhaps these thoughts are what has robbed my mind of fear. Whatever the reason, I suppose I wanted more. More than spirals, more than the fabric, more than the consciousness all around. There is more back story but the relevance has already exhausted itself. Here is what happened.



Realizing the smoke and gas was not something I could effectively utilize due to relatively pristine lungs (I have smoked three times in my entire life prior to the spirit, and it wasn't cigarettes, and it was different each time), I concluded an oral venture to be the most effective manner. This venture consisted of the accepted dosage of Harmine mixed with ginger tea. Half was taken first, then 15 minutes later, the remainder. As for the spirit; the dosage of that is essentially unknown. I used orange juice and mixed it in the containers used to store freebase. I mixed all of it, mostly residue. I would estimate 50-80mg. After consuming that I felt I really needed to go far this time. So, I grabbed my "machine," put my thumb on one end, filled it with orange juice, and poured it into a cup. Added another 1/4 dosage of Harmine, a tad more orange juice, and drank. The dosage is unknown. It could possibly have been astronomical. Perhaps dangerous? I'd say yes. Don't do what I did unless you are very familiar with madness.


So, there I was, laying in my bed. Listening to music; a very tranquil, relaxing variety. About 45 minutes in now, not experiencing anything yet, when, suddenly, my music goes to a familiar sound. It's this song by "Porcelain," and it was just so very strange because it's the same one that comes on at the onset of a few experiences when listening to music. Some familiar strangeness appears; the colors, the spirals, what I can only describe as "infinitely colored spiral feathers," and so on. Very familiar. Then, something happened. I can't explain it. Really, thinking about it now, it makes so much sense yet none at all. I was no longer here, and yet I was all the same. I believe at this point I vomited, but truthfully, I am unaware. All I know is in my mind there was vomit, and that vomit transformed the world. It left my mouth, and spiraled. It spiraled and formed the universe. It circle, over, over, vomiting continuously to create itself and itself then vomiting to create itself. It was an infinite loop and raw existence, of strange color, of lost reason, and simple repetition.


How long was I here? No, there was no longer "I." Just this spiraling pattern continuously created and recreated. This repeating sound. This strange state of being. My mind was gone, lost entirely to the repetition for eternity. It wasn't pleasant, unpleasant, it just was. It was senseless. True chaotic existence. How can I describe the indescribable? Never in all my mental journeys, dreams, thoughts, have I ever encountered such profound madness and profound harmony as this. What was it? What is it? That state of being, is it me? Is it the cycle of a microorganism? The cycle of an atom? Of a quark? Of a string? Is it even something? Whatever it was, I embraced it. I vomited, created, vomited, created, twisted, color shifted, and repeated over and over again. This strange world of fractal design. Of innumerable color and immeasurable void. Where thoughts exist for a nanosecond before being consumed by void then recreated.


Eventually, this place, the world, Earth, it started to return. My ability to "think" came back to me. I started the journey laying down orderly under blankets in a bed. I ended it entangled with blankets; my body was spiraled around the blankets, sort of in a fetal position. The blankets were entangled as well, soaked, soaked in vomit. Strange really. It was a direct reflection of what I experienced.
I don't know what I experienced. I feel it was something that could steal minds away forever. I don't know why mine wasn't stolen. But, here I am. It was interesting, and I look forward to my next venture into madness."
 

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corpus callosum
#2 Posted : 11/30/2011 5:37:03 AM

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Nice report!Smile

Hope you dont mind but I made your post into paragraphs so its easier to read and much more likely to get some replies.
I am paranoid of my brain. It thinks all the time, even when I'm asleep. My thoughts assail me. Murderous lechers they are. Thought is the assassin of thought. Like a man stabbing himself with one hand while the other hand tries to stop the blade. Like an explosion that destroys the detonator. I am paranoid of my brain. It makes me unsettled and ill at ease. Makes me chase my tail, freezes my eyes and shuts me down. Watches me. Eats my head. It destroys me.

 
NoBody
#3 Posted : 11/30/2011 7:20:05 AM
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corpus callosum wrote:
Nice report!Smile

Hope you dont mind but I made your post into paragraphs so its easier to read and much more likely to get some replies.


My bad - didn't check it after posting. I guess it took out my tabs I had originally. No matter, thank you for fixing it up for me Smile.
 
Shamasi Wiz
#4 Posted : 11/30/2011 10:07:24 PM

kissing stars, pissing lightning, dancing upside down


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The perpetual, life-creating vomit? That's pretty funny/awesome. I got caught in a loop like that, too. It felt like I was constantly creating and recreating the universe. It was fun and exhilarating, yet stressful and energy-consuming at the same time. Nice report. For me, huasca is definitely preferred to smoking. Good luck next time.
"I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it."
 
 
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