And so another being was lifted out of freefall and given wings to keep him from falling ever again...
As i have been a lurker before, and delved into hyperspace many times before finding this forum, im going to strip the descriptions of multidimensional buddah and 'colours of a higher octave' as someone on here geniously puts it, in hope for a more direct communication and to throw a line out of this ever-creating wonderfull BEAUTIFUL chaos of confusion. I cant talk about it like i just saw it for the first time, because i havent, im only doing this now out of respect for the website.
Dmt, (this being my first actual breakthrough) communicated one solid thing to me. one notion. one idea. >one< It wasnt words, it wasnt visual (well in the oberserver and obsevered sense), it was feeling. This i could say was sound after all it was vibration, (everythings differnt speeds of vibrations anyway) then after that point becomes impossible to recall and define effectively. it was instinctualy familiar, it was like my dna recognised it. I left the trip and remained some inches behind my head for some time, viewing reality as a beautiful in-depletable energy source of amazement, a jaw dropping devision of 'manifest' and 'non-manifest', the 3d plane and the boundarys of my eyes and other senses. Before i thought about it, i was (before the thought) what felt like the intersection of it. some not-even-worth-trying-to-contemplate void. i was everything going in instead of a 'me' looking outwards... sort of tunnel-like. habbit caused mind to come back and start to peice together the communication. how could no thought manifest understanding of thought itself.
I was really that all along, dmt did 'that' to 'me', thus i was left with a seed. a seed that felt like something that i put into words as 'a playful urgence of unesscesary importance, with a hint of free will'.
For the first time i felt a genuine pain in the heart and deep emotion for the problems in the world, it was vast beyond visible but a simple knowing of a deep fracture in the planets living system. the same system that seemed to have caught me in its net. we are all this 'void'. exactly the same one, connected like leaves on a tree. Months went by trial and erroring ways of explaining it to freinds i had smoke it with, then, one person i had known for years and years, (non dmt smoker) burst into smiles and laughter as i explained why i did psycadelics. i then learned he frequently goes out of body. hes 50 something, 'your a deep kid, and you have seen the other side of the light, i dont belive it' is what he said.
At a certain stage in my development, i gained new respect for differences in opinions and no longer was there any neuron-pathway that caused me to react to an idea being disproved or disbelived. i realized those of the higher understanding of it respect and embrace the under-mature (immature is too negative) beings, they are still growing into their new 'shell' of no boundarys and are simply just helping and nudging and all sorts XD
I am now in a place of slowly slowly releasing tension day by day, filled with creative motivation, every thought observed and old incompatible ones banished the second they are viewed. Its a constant hug. If ego is there, so be it. old ways are gone, i know i dont need scrutiny as that causes problems more. if i have thought, the are had, not 'happened' (difficult here).
In conclusion, I feel certainty in itself about reality can be shaped and morphed into anything it needs to be, as conciousness is to me now, the only proof for itself, and the only proof it will ever get. It makes its own answers, or it simply doesnt ask the question. Sure we have maths and science and everything, but in my heart i feel they are just like rulers and levels man places against the side of his 'enclosure' in hope to understand where the weakest point may be.
Much love to all those who are alive in this lucky-lucky time period on this sphere floating in something.
and thank you to the nexus, for being (and still being) the only place on earth i cant thank enough for just existing.
Your like a life boat, i cant put it into words. your like the god damn best ending to a sci fi movie ever.