Hello,

My name is Ringo, I turned 25 yesterday. I started the day with some gold cap mushrooms and Boys Noize. Easing into the familiar psychedelic comfort, my mind drew back to my most recent and prolific DMT experience. A little background may be necessary.

I have been playing drums since age 10. To me, music is medicine, I love all genres. At age 14, I fell in love with the band Tool. Everything about the music drew me in, Maynard's lyrics and voice, Justin's deep and brooding bass, Adam's tones and mostly Danny's masterful, unique and driving drumming. The album and song "Lateralus" were in heavy rotation, I listened to it every day for years. The lyrics and music made me want to live during a time when I struggled with suicide. I got through the difficult times with music and my best friend, Tommy. On my 18th birthday, he got me a tattoo of the flaming eye from the "Lateralus" album. He told me to look at it whenever I feel desperate and remember my love of music and how it has saved me.

There are things that happened in my past I was coming to terms with as a teen. I don't want to get into specifics and I understand everyone travels his or her own journey with hardships. I went in for professional psychiatric help at age 21. After the psychiatrists did my intake and evaluated my tests they shared my case with the team. They diagnosed me with major depressive disorder, post traumatic stress disorder, anxiety and an eating disorder. One doctor told me I had the choice to work with anyone I wanted as they found my case unique. The doctor told me that I had been through a handful of serious, life changing events. I told her that I had tried ecstasy just a few days before with a trusting friend. My friend helped me open my mind to things I was repressing and were simply untrue. The doctor said it was good that I had that experience and actually commended me on my strength with it. That experience was the first time I tried anything beyond marijuana.

I had done DMT three times with a pipe previous to this first experience with a bong. The other times were positive. I saw beautiful colors, felt powerful and danced. This time was an entirely different scene.

I put on the song "Lateralus," which is about nine minutes long, and drew a large hit from the bong as it started. In a matter of seconds it felt like I was falling through the floor in an elevator. The stereo was emitting an array of colors. They pulsed down the stand, out from the speakers and filled the room. It looked like Alex Grey's artwork. I sang the words and moved to the music, it felt like the closest thing to praying I've experienced. I remember pounding my chest with my fist, feeling complete euphoria and one with the song as I sang. When I blinked and closed my eyes, nothing changed. I was in another world.

I fell through the floor and opened my eyes. I was on a stage facing an endless crowd. There were a few people I knew on stage holding me, bracing me and smiling. The crowd was cheering, saying, "We've been waiting for you" and "She's finally here."

I want to say there were three entities that spoke to me, but it felt like they were one being. They said, "Welcome, give us your light. You are the goddess, we are here to make you as comfortable as possible while you do this. That's why we're playing this song, that's why your friends are next to you."

I was terrified and felt enormously drained suddenly, but was hopeful. I tried not to focus on the crowd and looked up at the familiar faces then to the being. The entities were dressed in robes and had a green, glowing hue. I asked how I should do it. They pointed at my Alex Grey tattoo and so did people in the crowd. They said, "You know what to do. Just let go."

Everyone was smiling and the people holding me were encouraging me. I let go of fear. I don't know what I did, but I gave them the light. It looked like the light started in my heart, traveled down my stomach and escaped between my legs. My whole body became white light and it felt like I was giving birth to light. It didn't hurt, but it definitely felt like something powerful was leaving my physical body.

The people were very happy. The light traveled over the crowd. They raised their hands as it showered down on them. All I remember after that is the beautiful colors and turning up the volume on the stereo.


I've thought about this experience every day since it happened this past May. I've since learned that Alex Grey's artwork and many themes of Tool's music, especially "Lateralus," involve DMT or psychedelic experiences of some sort.

I joined this site to learn about DMT in general, others' experiences and further understand my own. The experience made me feel more powerful and in control. It was so vivid and unforgettable.

Thanks for reading.

Welcome to the nexus, fellow traveler, friend Ringo,

it sounds like a very powerful experience. Giving birth to light reminds me of one of my most powerful experiences as well. I wonder what it means in your case though - did the entities and the crowd feel friendly? Sometimes I wonder about these situations and if we are supposed to listen to them or if they are tricking us in giving them our attention and energy. Maybe they are just parasites? But maybe that's looking at it from too small a viewpoint. In reality, our energy is infinite, no? And so sharing it with other beings can't harm us...

That being said, I've been a fan of Tool for like 11 years now. I love them dearly and desperately hope they will bring out a new album soon. I used to listen to them whenever I felt sad, especially when I felt scared and lonely during, say, acid trips... Now a days I listen to Mars Volta more than Tool - do you know them? They are not as profoundly spiritual and psychologically oriented as Tool (at least I cannot decipher any Jungian archetypes in their music) but they are amazing musically and riddle me constantly with the emotional depth and lyrics that are incomprehensible... Perhaps you will like them too

Come join us in the chat some time.
Otherwise I hope you find all you wish to find on the forum. We've got a lot here, from human contact and support to scientific information and spiritual speculations... Hope you enjoy!

Hello Enoon,

Thank you for reading through my experience and giving me a warm welcome. Everyone in the crowd felt very friendly. I wondered too if it was all a facade, I feared for a few seconds that they would turn evil, but this warm feeling of ease took over. I do know I felt very powerful when I did release the light. Everyone in sight was happy and I felt euphoric. It reminded of the lyrics from "Reflection:"

"And in my darkest moment, fetal and weeping
The moon tells me a secret, my confidant
As full and bright as I am, this light is not my own and
A million light reflections pass over me

It's source is bright and endless, she resuscitates the hopeless
Without her we are lifeless satellites dreaming dreams
And as I pull my head out, I am without one doubt, don't want to be down here soothing my narcissism, I
Must crucify the ego before it's far too late, I pray the light lifts me out"


Mars Volta is one of my favorite bands as well. I get lost in their music. They're another band I've listened to every day for years. I'll see you in the chat, thanks again for the warm welcome

Thank you for sharing your introduction with us. It sounds like it was a pretty powerful experience indeed.

It kind of reminds me of a journey one of my nephews had. He smoked a very small amount of jimjam (10mgs maybe?) just expecting to have a light body sensation and it instantly transported him to hyperspace where most of our family (living and dead) was there waiting for him to smother him (in a good way) with lots of cosmic hugs and to reassure him that everything is ok. I've never seen him smile so big before.

Thank you again for sharing your experience and Welcome to the Nexus!