This week I receive a new batch of iboga Rootbark.
I've started to take 2 grams a days, the noribogaine was building and it felt great. Feeling very strong, and positive about my life, and myself.
On friday, I had some friend to meet that were just passing by my town.
It was day 4 of 2grams RB, I've decided to set as an intention to give me more self confidence.
I brought some Corean food (looks like japanese maki and sashimi really) and they had some beers with them.
I drunk a sip.
My other friend offered me to drink some of this Bottle wash from a bottle of liquid acid.
I've remembered reading on another forum and this one, than combining mushrooms or LSD was quite awesome.
So I drunk a few sip from this coke can..
We were by the river and when I start feeling the come up of acid, we try to come back to my home to pick up a few plants to do some gardening in our garden.
So, I was with too acidified poeple and one sober who was driving.
I was starting to feel more and more stimulated physically and psychologically during the trip to my house.
It was getting almost incomfortable. Although some synesthesia like effects were very exciting.
At home, it was getting difficult and beautiful in the same time. Each form of life animal or vegatal, I could sense their powers, it felt very good to see my cats playing, the plants with all their differents design and all..
But my mind by all this explosion of meaning, of intentions was start to burn itself.
I was feeling less and less in the conscensus reality and more in a spirit world one.In fact during all thee phase I thought this was the strongest come up of LSD I've ever experienced.
It really was disorientating and debilitating to some extent.
After choosing the plants to bring to this garden, I really didn't feel like staying at mine with them chatting..
I've received an important phone call for job, I really wasn't able to answer without soudning sketchy so I postpone it to later in the evening.
I pushed poeple out of mine so we'd drive to this garden.
This was like the longest hardest to keep quiet. sitting in the car in traffic jam, I was feeling trapped and di want to walk but this garden was kilometers away and I didn't know the road to go there anyway.
When we finally made it to the garden place, I thought I could chill there being outside again in the sun, but in fact I think the presence of my friends was not in line with what what going on in my mind, which was burning, and felt so wrong I thought I did something wrong, was the mixing of iboga and lsd so dangerous nobody noticed it? Was it the little beer which added to this turn this "healing wood" into permanenetly "damaging wood",
I was now easily going into thoughts like I really screw my mind this time.
I wouldn't come back to my normal self, the one that can relate to my relatives.
Of course I couldn't garden in this state and moving the ground to plant somethings felt like why not leave the nature do as her own will?
I was finding a bit of rest in contemplating the clouds in hte blue sky.
I could see how each cloud would metamorphoses in giant vessel, palace and such, I was avoiding social contacts with my peers but unfortunatley we've had an old man here who was ready to spread his negativity, he arrive asking me if we were the new renter of this piece of land, apparently he did want to make things clear he was in charge, and we weren't legit eventually.
I called my friend who knew the previous owner and they spoke together, I could really feel his dark soul. this was very oppressing.
At this point I started to realize that I did need to stay by myself, to do my own trip. Because the thoughts of being discovered as completely gone crazy was holding me too much into pretending to be self-controlled and reasonnable but I really felt I wasn't.
After a bit more we start to debate it's time to go, they wanted to do a seafood restaurant.
I was thinking being driven will be a difficult moment again, but I could then leave them.
We did move and I manage to get dropped as soon as I knew roughly (I had lots of doubt about the right road to take) where about I'm in the city.
Everything during all the tryp felt like a GIANT BATTLE OF SPIRITS FOR THEIR OWN WILL. :evil: :evil:
As soon as I was walking, I started to be by myself and try to mkae it back to my home, thinking if I could find an antidote to this evil-feeling (I thought salvia might cleanse me, but it could also stuck me in hyperspace).
Slowly, slowly I start to know where on earth I was, I arrive home, didn't know what to do, so I start to use my energy to do some clean up for my flatmate who was coming back tonite from hollidays.
doing things with good intentions of poeple and animal health and comfort felt really good and I was slowly feeling more and more in control.
I was feeling I need at least to stay useful to others so they couldn't blame me to be a weight.
My flatmate arived with a friend and while I try not to look completely nut (they didn't know what I 've took, and I didn't know this new flatmate position towards psychedelics), but we have some good laugh together, while smoking weed.
In fact what happened next was the more orgasmic feelings from this tryp.
A crystallization of what happened, it felt like whatever happened I did all I could do to control and do'nt push others down with me. I never told anyone I felt completely overwhelmed, and try quietly to not show any sign of stress, although my mind was burning in front of my eyes.
I could feel now my mind re-birth, and the sense of reason coming back.
Some giant healing feeling all around my soul, body, mind...
everything started to make sense again.
And I was now completely filled with peace and warm feelings
It was antipodes.
I could feel really confident towards life in general and my choice in particular.
Complete LSDiboga bliss carry on for a good rest of the evening, I was still a bit disoriented but happy to be more alive than ever.
(I atached a copy of the "ibogacapsules" I've start reading before dosing that day, and which remind me the self-suggestive power of stating intentions, for those interested to work with iboga low doses.)
Smell like tea n,n spirit !
Toke the toke, and walk the walk !