Something has been troubling me for the past few months. I'll try to keep this short and rant at a minimum.
Before I took psychedelics I was a mess. I was depressed, unfriendly...The works. I took DMT and after about 3 uses it showed me the way out. I had just met a new group of people and they didn't know me well yet. I decided to change myself and start fresh. It's been working well and I have been able to preserve this new freedom even after stopping DMT use. I owe DMT and this community alot for helping me out.
What I'm faced with now is knowledge. Knowledge that the hamburger I eat comes from an animal that lives on dirt and is probably abused. If not physically, then psychologically. Nobody likes being confined. I'm seeing things in other people that bothers me. I see poverty, hunger, anguish and it's impossible to ignore. I want to help but I really don't know how. I can't stop eating meat because I get sick, I can't help the poor because I'm barely getting by. I can't help people's grief because they need to get over it on their own to an extent.
I see pollution, oil spills, war...How can I ignore it? The psychedelic experience showed me how to relax. It showed me how to be a better person, not to judge, and to let go of yourself. It didn't show any sympathy for starvation, poverty, and sickness.
Almost everyone who's done psychedelics will tell you the same thing: Enjoy life, just go with the flow. I cannot relate to this. Sure, I can volunteer at an animal hospital and feel better about myself, soothe my conscience. But there's always going to be all this shit in the world. We can't recover from it, people are blind. Take for instance a recent article about a woman who dumped a cat in a garbage bin to die.
They're trying to argue she's mentally ill...Of course she is, we all are, we're all sick. She dumped that cat to hurt someone. If some family would feel sad about the loss of their cat, then good. Makes her feel better about herself. People would tell me to stay calm at something like this....I'm enlightened and must set an example, show self restraint and forgive her actions.
I hate this, it's like being stuck in a vice. You stay close to one side of it and you don't get crushed. But sooner or later the other half is on the way. DMT showed me how to embrace all that is good. But now the bad stands out like a speed bump and I can't ignore it. I think what really set me off was the bill hicks show I watched last night...The one where he just loses it on the crowd and says we all need to die. I browse online forums and everywhere I look there's people who enjoy hurting others. There's a popular game minecraft where you build things like lego in 3D. People actually log on just to ruin artwork and they think it's fun. They enjoy seeing people getting angry and frustrated. How can we possibly recover from this.
"Human kind needs to abandon earth if we hope to survive". Why, so we can move elsewhere and screw everything up again?
I don't know where I read this, hell maybe I'm just making it up as I go:
"I worked my whole life to become enlightened and now I'm forced to watch the whole world go insane."
We're the new hippies, we get high on life, not drugs.
We thrive in drama, and bathe in activeness.
Fashion is a religion and vocabulary defines you.
Politicians load the gun, and celebrities fire it, killing all humankind.