First off hello to everyone and thanks for providing this place of knowledge. I've been exploring for a lot time (since childhood). I got into this very young and some point in life I stopped everything all together and recently found the universe has led me back. Now I'm interested in cultivating my own for personal use and exploration as well as just a fun project, hobby in terms of learning the chemical side of things. That all aside let me tell you about a pretty awesome experience I very recently had that really changed my experience. I think it's fitting I'm listening to Rush's Xanadu as I write this because it felt epic in that respect.

So I took 10g of some beautiful Mexican mushrooms, ate dry. I didn't know what I was going in for at first. I try not to set expectations when I do this and I just let whatever happen find me. If it doesn't, then maybe next time but I try not to force it artificially. Mind you this was also done solo, as how I prefer to do things. It hit hard and things were quite silly for a while, I was a little kid causing mischief through my house but I think it's interesting to note, when I trip I often find myself in a stimulus rich environment and what was about to happen was the entire opposite.

So my wireless headphones died and I found myself in silence. Shortly there later I felt a calling to an empty room. There is a "woman" whom I've felt I've encountered before while tripping that is a very positive sort of vibe. Previously I watched her dance on my ceiling like a ballerina to my music during another trip. Obviously not literally but I'm sure you all get it.

Anyways, I felt this calling to goto this room so I answered. It was pitch-black and the room is mostly empty. The initial vibe was one of fear and it felt like eyes were all over the room as I peered in as well as shapes of guardians. My eyes desperately attempted to create shapes from these objects but the best I could do was create what felt like an old domed structure with the eyes blinking and watching me and this feeling of giant sentinels in there as well. I felt this was a heroes journey of epic proportions so I closed the door and embraced it.

I found a spot to lay down where some clothes had just been lazily tossed and I looked up to the ceiling wondering what the universe was giving me. Mind you this environment was pitch black and dead silent, the opposite of what I was just in. This was also around the 3rd hour maybe of everything. I had some pretty intense Alice in Wonderland moments in my world of color so I had no idea what this void was going to give me.

As I gaze up I see my light on the ceiling but it looks like a slugs ass, reading to birth more slugs (Rosaria Dark Souls 3), or some monstrous vortex. It was very evil and ugly and it looked like little 15th century demon faces where kind of around it. Everything just felt dark and nasty. Then I had this thought, she guided me here, this is her, but she's such a positive feeling surely she isn't this hideous but in fact so beautiful I cannot fathom her. In that moment everything shattered and the room was full of life. Like I witnessed some big bang. Everything felt holy and my soul felt so clean, I felt like I just had sex with the universe and had the most cerebral orgasm inside her.

At this moment I felt compelled to stand up, like our time was over here but as I did I couldn't move. I just stood there and had the most post orgasm mental clarity ever. Nothing was trippy and all made crystal clear sense. I felt so fresh and alive. Then something even more beautiful happened, I started to see the few objects around me connected by fields and I could see molecules in the air but they were red geometric squares, rectangles, and when I held them and dumped them from hand to hand, little cubes. Then the cubes would combine and make almost little worlds in my hands.

I felt so clear and connected. I momentarily admired my hands and their beauty for now they appeared like silver or even marble and I had thought this beauty is surely how an artist sees the world as he chisels away a sculpture. Then my walls became complex geometric patterns which looked like Aztec or Mayan wheels, and it felt like I was in a giant clock almost with gears all around me. Yet this room was pitch black and it simply felt like the center of the universe.

Lastly I reached out and a small window to the world opened and I felt like I was back in time as best I could describe it. Everything appeared like a desert and it was golden. I had thought maybe this was Egypt and I had bridged time and space to seeing a past life. I felt as if I was standing with the Gods and their hands were upon my shoulders. I felt renewed, I felt alive, more life than I've ever felt and all I could think was we have to protect this, we have to take care of each other and this world.

Then in that moment a generator came on and I knew that my journey was over. I went to leave and as I reached for the door, a place where a lock was slithered up the door (mind you I wasn't seeing anything else in this moment, I still felt incredibly lucid) and all I could think was a snake it's trying to trap me here but surely this is the last of my Herculean Labor to prove my worth for the fruits that were just shared. So I opened the door and was birthed back into the world.

The world was brighter than it ever seen and I made my way back to the living room. Everything felt normal and I thought maybe I'd been in there much longer than I expected. I sat down and popped my headphones out of their charger (that took like 30 minutes just to get in there lol, such a task) and thought maybe that was my climax, it was over. I put on some music, lit a cigarette, and looked up and the hammer of Thor came crashing down like a pile of bricks as I got hit 10x harder than previously and I got whirled back into the madness and goofy. But I made sure that I'd hold onto this. Surely it means something if even only to me.

That night I'd have a few more moments of just feeling beautifully whole again as it waxed and waned through me but that has by far been the most intense experience I've ever had and now it has me curious to the opposite what I normally do and explore the darkness more and less of the light.

I truly feel that night I dined on honey dew and drank the milk of paradise. I'm interested in exploring more and seeing what keys to the soul and mysteries of the world are out there. Usually my experiences have been fun and goofy with profound thoughts but never something so esoteric and absolutely breath takingly beautiful. The only sad part is I have no one to share this with and more so I wish I could find a way to give this beauty to the world.

I plan to try to go deeper but I know each experience is never the same and it has me thinking a lot about my own soul and consciousness and while I've always been healthy and taken care of myself, more so now more than ever do I want to protect and care for this vessel we call a body that currently houses all this stuff.

Thanks for listening and providing an outlet to share these experiences. Life is so beautiful we often take it for granted and as someone in a big city now more than ever do I feel myself just wanting to return to nature and being under the stars again. This whole year has been a real reawaking experience for me and I feel the universe is giving me a lot of things but damn, what a gift this has been most recently. I don't know if it means anything or what but I can't stop thinking about it.

Another interesting thing, this room for a long time was a room I kept shut and didn't go in so it's funny how now it's almost symbolic for regrowth. Actually I almost forgot to mention, as a kid we had a room we'd trip in and draw on the walls with black light chalk while tripping as sort of a record of what we explored and witnessed. At some point in there I felt like I was back there. Just interesting.

Thanks! I typed this all on my phone, hope it makes sense...

Sounds like a pretty memorable experience to say the least. Thank you so much for sharing, I really enjoyed your story and the level of descriptiveness you used. As far as a breakthrough I’m gonna stick with the good ol cop out answer that if you had to ask if this was a breakthrough it probably wasn’t. But don’t feel discouraged. You don’t have to have a breakthrough to have a beautiful transcendental experience as you’ve just figured out. Typically with a breakthrough ego death 💀 plays a big role. Completely letting go and losing yourself in the experience. I may be wrong though. Ten gs of mushrooms could definitely get you there if you aren’t a regular. ... anyways thanks again for the read and if you ever need an outlet to share these experiences this is the place to go.

Yeah I didn't think it was but I've read mixed explanations of what some people consider to be an actual break through. It was funny cause after that all happened shortly later it just felt like waves of feeling like I was being vitalized and energized to insane levels. I really can't do justice how amazing that experience was. I trip I'd say way more than the average person but probably not to the extent some people have here. I'm looking forward to exploring the opportunity to eventually see where DMT leads but that will take a little more time.

I've heard 20g, the fabled heroic dose takes you to those levels but have yet to step in something that strong, though I'm interested. I read an interview where 10 to 20 isn't a double dose but an exponential jump so I'm thinking maybe next time taking it to somewhere around 15g. I have enough experience that I'm confident and not intimidated but as with every experience it still needs respected and not under estimated because you don't know what kind of experience you'll ultimately have.

I usually don't plan out trips either, just decide on a general time frame and then wait for the universe to kind of tell me, take them tonight. Assuming I can responsibly then I follow through. I'm so interested now in just stripping away all the stimulation rich environments and being in total nothingness while it happens too. While I love my music, watching wacky animation, and enjoying it for the richness of the overall experience, the nothingness was so amazing. I never thought I'd experience something like that.

I think it's interesting too the media and music we digest leading up things, I wonder how much they regurgitate back into the experience because I feel like there are a lot of themes and things I've been interested in that I feel like helped influence and set this all up prior going into it. It's also funny that I have this bust of Aristotle and I had a candle burning in front of him as if some esoteric invocation of the spirits of old and at some point I remember talking to him asking him to reveal the mysteries of the universe to me, half serious, half aware I'm tripping really hard and not taking myself too serious just being swept away but yet possibly this primed my mind to later be open to experiencing this.

Anyways thanks for reading. I've been wanting to talk about it so much without feeling like I was just a crazy person. I know in this grounded form of reality I was just some guy standing in my room in the pitch black, at least to the casual observer but I read some forums where people discuss things they experience and then people immediately go into maybe you're just a crazy person talk and it's disheartening because this is to me some of the entire reason we explore and trip and to dismiss people's experiences like that makes it feel pointless to even have that kind of environment for discussion in the first place.

Well... idk how much exploring you’ve done on the nexus but I can promise, no one here is gonna call you crazy lol... welcome to the nexus and i look forward to reading your future post ☺️👍

Welcome!!! I can assure you noone will be rude to you here, these guys will take care of you as long as youre intelligent and respectful I love it here, enjoyed this place since i was a youngin'