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Had a very intense and disturbing experience and looking for any insight anyone might have. Options
 
Papasmurfx991
#1 Posted : 2/20/2019 3:35:03 AM
VERY LONG POST, I AM EXTREMELY SORRY BUT EVERY DETAIL INCLUDED I FEEL IS NECESSARY TO MENTION TO UNDERSTAND THE CONTEXT OF THE WHOLE STORY AND GIVE ME PROPER FEEDBACK. THANK YOU!

Just under one month ago was the when this experience happened, and it was the last time I have taken DMT. A little background info I feel worth providing is at the time of this experience I had my adderall prescription and was taking it about daily. I was also venturing into hyperspace multiple times a night generally. First with smaller warm-up doses, usually working up around 30-60mg doses. The experience I will be discussing was around my 25th experience.

I understand and have seen the endless knowledge and information pertaining to the effects of mixing adderall and DMT on the nexus and how it is widely advised not to mix. Regardless though, I had already dabbled with the combo a few times and never really had a bad experience, just maybe sometimes I would only get a buzz. So on the night, I finished up what was left of my spice in my rig instead of my usual method with the Yocan vape. After not really getting to a desirable effect, late in the night during my all nighter around 5:15 a.m. I began to extract all of the Resin from my rig, all of which was from DMT. I was able to get a substantial amount, I didn't weigh it since it was sticky concentrate, but was definitely around the .2 mark if not more. I proceeded to load it all into my Yocan Vape making it a rather large pack of DMT, which I didn't really have an idea of how much it weighed. I wanted to make sure that I packed enough to breakthrough and not be disappointed again, but didn't really considerably take into account how much I might have actually packed or if the effects of smoke DMT res would be different than before it was already dabbed, since I always recycle my thc dabs.

So with my pen fully charged, around 5:25 a.m. I begin to take my first rip(at this point I took about 60 mg of my 20mg quick release adderall within the last 12 hours and 20 of it within 4 hours, so I am definitely zooted, and also drank some red bull throughout the night. not the best combo probably for a DMT trip but hasn't caused a troubling experience yet.) and after burst ripping it for 10-15 seconds, I am able to get a Huge hit from the pen, one of my biggest yet probably due to packing a likely oversized chamber from not weighing the res. Usually, I go for 3-4 rips and will have finished all of what was packed, or will have reached my desirable effect and just let free and enjoy. I always try to get as much as possible in the first and second rip though.

This time though, seconds after I began to exhale the cloud that was left after holding in for a brief amount of time, I just had zero urge to take a second hit. I always close my eyes following my last hit and let my journey play out, rarely do I open my eyes and when I do, my experience or visuals usually aren't as elaborate, but I will still see and experience the many different entities you have heard about on the forums or seen and experienced yourself, such as the Jester person, the machine elves, this guardian night figure that appears to me at the end of a wormhole/tunnel as a guardian of it essentially but is just waving to me, this princess fairy woman that appears when I'm in immense states of love and emotion.

In what seemed to be a rapid transition after letting out that first hit and not wanting another, I began to feel this very noticeable and strong wave of energy enter in and flow throughout my room. I turn around in my office chair just from what my senses are telling me and I basically see what appears to be some sort of circle formed in about half of my bedroom.With the being lights off, I almost was convinced that the hampers I had in my room and small dresser were arranged in some sort of circle or pattern as well. As this is all happening so suddenly and rapidly, while feeling all this energy in my room and something formed this circle and arrangement, and this circle I saw wasn't like a line that was drawn on the ground or something, it was like a magnetic wave circulating clockwise in a circle in the air about mid-level of my bedroom, if you can picture that or that makes any sense. As I am processing all of this, while being basically really freaked out and have my eyes completely open, I start hearing something talk to me and tell me I am playing the circle game, I'm stuck playing the circle game. This voice wasn't something I heard out loud, rather it was just being told to me or being put into my head. I stand up from my chair, still freaking out, not in the sense where i'm screaming and crying for help, but in the sense that I don't know what the FUCK is going on and have never experienced anything remotely on this level in my entire life or in any of my DMT journeys. As previously mentioned, I've seen all the common and popular entities that many individuals experience, and would have them present in almost all journeys about after my 4th or 5th experience.

What I was currently being encountered by, was like nothing I had previously encountered, and this intelligent force i'll call it made it known and clear to me or at least gave the impression that it was very powerful, almost as if it was omnipotent and omniscient. So here I am in my room standing up looking at what I'm making out to be this circular magnetic field hovering in my room and I am pretty convinced no furniture in my room actually completely reorganized because I can't comprehend that possibility but my current perception of the 2 hampers and dresser I have in this part of the room covered with some clothes made out some sort of circle or pattern, or combination of the two, and this whole area essentially glowing to me making it stand out and appear as if was all outlined a in red and black. Seeing all of this happen in the middle of my room in the snap of a finger after I took that 1 large hit of DMT Res was a lot for me to try to process and figure out what I need to do, I didn't blast off or ever close my eyes once, I wasn't physically impaired like I would by on a lot of my journeys where my routine usually would be to just lay in bed as soon as can after finish my hits. In my mind, I believed I was totally aware of what I was currently experiencing, as if this could have happened just 15 minutes earlier before smoke the spice and I would be responding and perceiving everything the same way.

At the same time, I was confident that was I was currently experiencing likely became immediately possible after DMT was released in my system and allowed me to see and experience such phenomenons, entities, or forces and beings that operate within different dimensions or maybe right with us but we just aren't able to be in contact with them in our sober mind frames? I don't know the ins and outs of all the current theories but basically the popular opinion regarding how we are able to come in contact with these other spirits or entities after ingesting the DMT molecule probably has something to do with what made this experience possible.

So at this moment in my experience after seeing what I described above, and I am hearing something or this thought be put into my head that i'm playing the circle game or i'm stuck playing the circle game, and I on top of seeing this magnetic field circulating in the air in my room, I can just feel the presence of something very powerful, which at the time I believed to be very evil and a very powerful demonic force attacking me. So as I stood there right outside this magnetic circle, I was panicking and freaking out in my head what my next move was, screaming to my 3 other roomates didn't even occur as a thought probably due to my awareness of the strength of this force and that there was nobody who could save me right now but me if anything. Flustered about not comprehending this fucking game i'm stuck playing or what the fuck i need to do, I had this notion that I was supposed to go around the circle or something i really dont know, but i stepped into it, and right as I stepped into this circular magnetic current, my right hand which was still holding onto my Yocan wax pen was moved up and around my back a little by what felt like this almost effortless tug and lift on my arm guided my magnetic fields or force, being guiding into the direction this circle was rotating in. As soon as this happened, endless thoughts run through my head, and out of all the entities I encountered previously on DMT were visible to me either with my eyes closed or open, but the current force being dealt with was completely invisible, whilst having the most powerful and known presence.

As soon as my hand was rotated in this motion, with the style of force that was used that I have never felt in my life, I know at that moment I was either utterly fucked, or was gnna make a run for help and if this force was gnna hurt me then so be it. I make a run for my door, unlock it, run into my floormates bedroom screaming at him to wake up and get the fuck in my room and something super fucked up is happening and I'm being attacked by a Demon blah blah blah, as soon as he gets up and starts following me to my room, and I start walking back towards it to show him, I see that everything is appearing completely normal as usual, and I look like I'm fucking crazy, he then makes a smirky comment to me about being awake at 5:30 in the morning and having my DMT vape in hand and am acting fucking crazy, so in distraught and anger I speed walk to the front door, which we Never lock, ever,just because we are college kids who don't care that much and are very fortunate and live in a very nice neighborhood and area. But when i try to open the door so i can throw my vape as far as i can just cuz i'm being irrational and tweaking balls, I can't get it to open, so in the random event that someone locked it, I turn the lock the other way and try again, and I can't get the door to move or open, then begin freaking out again, run back to my roomate bedroom screaming I'm locked in the house blah blah, he comes over with me and we open the door first try.

I was too scared to even consider going back into my room, I was up on adderall studying because I had an exam at 9:30 a.m for Spanish and didn't even have it in me to run into my room to grab all my study materials to bring into the family room. I sat out there for over an hour thinking about what just happened, what just attacked me, a demon? Was I attacked? a game? the circle game? why would a demon play a game with me? nothing made any sense. Fast forward to now, about 4 weeeks later and after endless thought on the incidence I come here to post and ask for insight or advice. I have multiple times now thought I figured out what my experience might have been or included, and after eventually thinking I might have had teaching experience with a spirit guide or some sort I began to make peace and sense of it, because my lifestyle at the time was kind of repetitive and going through the same motions, and even after multiple times realizing and acknowledging what lifestyle habits and actions I needed to change and improve, I never really acted on them. So I was kind of stuck playing a circle game with myself, and maybe this was just my spirit guide messing with me in a profound way that would resignate with me by making me experience what I did.

This sounded a lot better than it being a demonic attack, so I rolled with it for a little, but obviously, one doesn't not stop thinking about an experience like this where they felt and saw what I did. I started talking to this girl a little over 3 months ago, and since then we are basically in love I feel like and spend every day together and she sleeps over every night, literally every night. And after I had this experience, I didn't bring it up to her going out of my way but the topic of believing in spirits and ghosts came up, and this experience was less than a week fresh so I told her about it and said it happened multiple weeks ago. Since that night and this last journey, some very small, yet really random and way too coincidental things have happened that are very creepy and made me very uneasy feeling. One of the first instances was me taking a shower, playing music through my phone like usual, picked my song, closed out my phone and hopped in the shower, as soon as hopped in the shower, my phone changed to a different song that was in a random place in my library from where I just was, and my phone was locked so it wasn't even like it was sitting unlocked and this happened, I just hopped out dried off my hands changed back the song and didn't think about it again and nothing else happened. A lot of random times when warm and with her and she will get sudden cold rushes or waves, usually which I don't notice, but she does and emphasizes them in a sense that its not just like a normal wave of cold air. We got back from a concert last weekend and when we are walking up to the front door around 3 in the morning, her car keys battery that's used to turn on her car from a distance played out this tune, like a happy song jingle that was 5 seconds long and then stopped, she looks at me and goes what the fuck was that, I respond all causally saying its nothing or that it probably randomly does that but she said it never has ever in the 6 months she has had it and was very spooked. I calmed her and didn't give her any scary ideas but it creeped me the fuck out. Last night, around 3-4 a.m while I am up playing fortnite she wakes up randomly and I just turn around to go kiss and hug her and when I do, her battery makes another weird few beeps that she has never heard before and asked me what the fuck was that, which I respond your battery... doesn't it always do that? One last weird occurrence was when we were laying in bed last week just cuddling and I always set up my air diffuser if you know what that is, and you can set it to different color modes that light up like a night light, which I had on and don't remember which color but for some reason I think had on red because that's my girls favorite color it emits so I always put it on, and as we are laying there it just turns off, she doesn't even notice, but I do because I know its supposed to stay on until I turn off. I just shrugged off and didn't think about it, but as these things continue to happen and almost more often seemingly, I think about this experience and night it all first happened or started and don't honestly know what the fuck I might have encountered or experienced and need guidance.

So sorry for such a long story but one last bit to mention, my best friend who I dabble with psychedelics went out to bars a couple nights ago and was his first time meeting my girl, we all came back to my house after, girl passed right out drunk, me and friend stay up and trip on Lucy catching up where I tell him the whole story of what happened. and he has had some pretty extraordinary experiences before on shrooms and lucy in a paranormal aspect and I completely trust this friend and their perspective, opinion and outlook, and before I could even finish telling him the whole story he didn't want to hear any more of it in my house because he could feel the presence of something else with us too strongly and in an uneasy or non peaceful manor, and he was tweaked out the rest of the time here and kept saying he felt cold.

Thank you so much for reading all the way through if you were able to stay engaged, please leave any comments, insight, advice, guidance, tips, anything below. It will be greatly appreciated.
 
ducdevil
#2 Posted : 2/20/2019 4:28:48 AM
welcome to the Nexus - i see this is your first post. bravo.

to begin, thank you for such a well-written account of your experience. from your description i can feel how terrifying and bizarre it must have been. i am glad you are taking the time to process it. also, thanks for separating it into paragraphs! made it much easier to read.

however, and you know what i'm going to say, in many ways you asked for this. amphetamines are NOT a good mix for any psychedelic, especially something as deep and profound as DMT. you were amped up, sleep deprived and anxious about school. i am not sure what you thought might happen other than what did.

and also...you speculate 200mgs if i read it right? my God...that dose is unthinkable under the best circumstances for most if not all of us. add in the speedy nature of your "set" - man, that is a recipe for disaster and a neon-lit poster for "don't ever do this."

yet, i am not lecturing you - i am pointing out what i'm sure you know now. part of the trick of tripping safely and with respect is to adhere to the 3 S's : Set, Setting and Skill. i'm afraid you missed all three. maybe a pass on Setting, but i can't be sure since your description doesn't tell much about your surroundings, other than housemates which can be a problem sometimes.

take care, and be wise - there's a great Yoga Sutra:
"the pains which are yet to come, can, and are to be avoided." 2.16

meaning, know a decision or choice is a bad one before you make it.

as to the paranormal issues you wonder about - hard to say. my first idea is that the "demons" are your unconscious speaking to you. i doubt if you encountered real demons, but rather icons representing the negative thoughts buried in you. what they pertain to? not for me to say, but DMT brings the subconscious to the surface and reveals itself.

peace
 
332211
#3 Posted : 2/20/2019 7:40:21 AM
feel your instincts and decide, what the dmt-realm is for you. and, as in life: do not trust anyone or anything blindly. if there is deception, you will run straight into it otherwise.

i got really badly hyperslapped about four years ago myself - by trusting blindly and by the wish to get us all out of this existence, that lacks satisfaction. the fear is gone, but the insights i got from this still accompanie me every day and definitly shapped me to the better. i would say that i could have lived without the experience and it helped in no way in practically solving my troubles (and i still have troubles, this is part of the human experience until awakening). but it was a sort of catylist to fire my progress to changing things... meditation and reading the right stuff was super important.

what i can tell you is, what freaks you out is a natural reaction of your body in response to something perceived as a threat. this triggers the freeze - fight or flight response and this gives you this uncomfortable feeling because your body gets pumped with adreanaline and scientist knows what Pleased

now that you "burned your fingers" with dmt, this stress response gets triggerd by minor incidents like the "locked door incident" - do you see how stress makes us incapable of handling the easiest things - "the phone incident" and the "car key incidet".

your mind is just playing a trick on you in all of the named situations. and you switch over to reacting emotiaonally. emotions are not per se bad - you can not stop them from happening - but you can influence your reaction to them. and one tool for this is - tadaaaaa - rational thought.

you can trigger this by training yourself in thinking. the trigger will be the question "so what?" and "what am i missing right now?". learn to see fear as something that you can just watch, like a picture on the wall. "you" do not feel fear, there is just fear present. if you want to go a bit deeper into this i can reccomend you four books:

"the mind illuminated" by john yates - this is the best handbook on meditation available right now. if you follow it, it should solve *lots* of other problems too.

"the power of now" by eckhart tolle - this teaches how to stay present, which will ease the threat-pangs.

"the easy way to stop smoking" - just exchange cigarettes with adderall, smoking with popping a pill and so on, you'll be suprised about the insights.

"how i found freedom in an unfree world" - the concepts in this book can free you from unpleasant strings that seem to hold you back and may even counter your view on what happened in your room and free you from that.

good luck my friend, you won*t have time to let your mind race when you have so much to read Pleased

 
0_o
#4 Posted : 2/20/2019 8:16:32 AM
I can't help but wonder how much of the experience is informed by ontology.
Would a person with no concept of "evil entity" or "demon" be capable of perceiving one?
Fear is a natural response to being overwhelmed and to the unfamiliar and the brain has a compulsive need to connect the dots, to explain what it experiences, it cannot accept the unknown.

 
aaalyafei
#5 Posted : 2/20/2019 9:45:39 AM
Good read my friend and very interesting experience.

I personally believe, without a shadow of a doubt, that DMT entities are real. They are self-aware, intelligent, deceptive and cunning creatures with skills that surpass ours, including projection and/or tapping into the visual cortex of our minds as well as downloading-uploading in whatever way they do.

Since my last DMT experience, I have had some weird things happen to me too. I even heard something whisper into my ear while I was in bed some weeks ago, completely sober. Not sure what it said though.

My dreams have since (it has gotten much better now) become disturbed and hijacked by these creatures that take the form of so many strange characters.

My point being, I believe after doing DMT there is some sort of strange link created between you and the entity(ies) you encountered. Like they somehow latch on in whatever way they do like a parasite/leech.

Don't be intimidated, they are just masters of illusion and have 0 real control over you except for a few whispers and weak party tricks.

Much love,
A
 
332211
#6 Posted : 2/20/2019 9:49:49 AM
hey astral and aaa, wanna meet in the chat Smile
 
AcaciaConfusedYah
Chemical expertSenior Member
#7 Posted : 2/20/2019 6:00:41 PM
Hey there!

Welcome to the forum! You had just the experience that you were looking for!

This is good news! It may not seem like it at first... but in time it will become more clear. Time works in a patient way.

Insight?

If you are prescribed the medication, take as prescribed and not as you prescribe yourself.

College is a hectic time; at least it was for me... I had to make some choices of things to sacrifice. Sleep is not a wise choice to offer as the sacrifice.

Now, you're aware! If the educational experience of academia is something you wish to pursue, then I highly advise considering time management. I know school is rough at times. It took me a long time to figure it out. If you really want it, don't do the activities that result in a choice of "pulling an all nighter." The all nighter DOES NOT, mark my words.... DOES NOT work. It will leave you in a worse condition than you started.

I tried the all nighter 2 times. Nope... didn't go well. I was delirious by the time i had to be at class, and my focus was disjointed. I could barely focus on a single question of the test. I just kept turning the pages of the test to see if i could find some hidden hint from within the test. Nope. That didn't work either. I was too concerned about being unprepared that I'd actually made myself unprepared. Get my drift?

What did i change? I made sacrifices by cutting ties with the distractions that resulted in poor time management.

Imo, it's not about the med or the drugs. They are a tool. But, if you use the tool carelessly, then there is a chance it will impede more than help, or backfire. The answer is that you must make choices and follow with action - if you wish to succeed in college. If not, that's ok too. There are other options to achieve happiness... but, in hindsight - the process of learning brought me the most bliss. Even during some of the darkest hours...

It may be worth considering your relationship with drugs and determine which patterns are healthy; which are unhealthy; and how to achieve a balance. DMT is not evil. Adderall is not evil. Intention of the user sets the expectation.


Take care,
ACY


P.S. - The friend that became uncomfortable... Was that something that generated during the conversation? Or, how was the demeanor prior? Could you have made a suggestion that set forth an expectation? Some things to consider.
Sometimes it's good for a change. Other times it isn't.
 
dragonrider
Moderator
#8 Posted : 2/20/2019 10:38:06 PM
Hello and welcome.

I have experienced myself, that when you are tripping together, personal fears and emotions can be easily passed onto others. I think that could maybe explain what happened when you where talking about this with your friend.

About evil entities and powers and such.....who knows what's real or not real. I wouldn't want to say i do.

But suppose they do exist. What could be the best defence against them?

Well, since we know nothing about them, we don't know if silver bullets might work, or garlic or holy water.......what about just trying to be good? Trying to be the best person you could be?
Wouldn't that be the safest bet? That the best protection from evil, is goodness?

And it won't cost you a thing, even if evil entities are not real.
 
theAlkēmist
#9 Posted : 2/21/2019 10:56:16 PM
dragonrider wrote:
Hello and welcome.

I have experienced myself, that when you are tripping together, personal fears and emotions can be easily passed onto others. I think that could maybe explain what happened when you where talking about this with your friend.

About evil entities and powers and such.....who knows what's real or not real. I wouldn't want to say i do.

But suppose they do exist. What could be the best defence against them?

Well, since we know nothing about them, we don't know if silver bullets might work, or garlic or holy water.......what about just trying to be good? Trying to be the best person you could be?
Wouldn't that be the safest bet? That the best protection from evil, is goodness?

And it won't cost you a thing, even if evil entities are not real.


Love this
“The art of alchemy is like a psycho-spiritual multi-vitamin and mineral elixir secreted by the cosmic mind to help heal the collective madness that has infected our world.”

“If the prima materia contains poison, then the more virulent the poison, the more powerful are its potential healing qualities. Accomplished alchemists are able to transmute the poison into a healing nectar.“
 
 
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