Metta-Morpheus wrote:Teamleary wrote: I can't use this time as a retreat, I have to deal with the same kind of conventionalities and yet, I don't have the important human interactions...
For instance, it's been 12 days since I had a talk with someone "IRL". I can feel that it's "doing" something in me.
Anyway, I hope everybody is doing okay...
love,
paul
Man, I’m sorry Paul. I will put out some good thoughts for you, as I can’t imagine that. I’ve at least had my wife and kids through this. We’ve stayed pretty isolated, except my wife and I both work for essential businesses, so we still have to go into the world for that. Ive taken time off work to help with that further. Stay up man. If you want, pm and we can chat. I feel for you brother. ❤️❤️🤙
Oh man, thank you so much for that!
It has ups and downs, yeah. It now has been 3 weeks since my last "I got to talk to someone and feel their gaze on me" ahaha.
One interesting thing I take from that experience is the gap between conscious and subconscious experience. For instance, way before noticing any shift in my mood, I started having bad dreams. Not awful nightmares mind you. I'm not having unbearable nights, but, in general, I pretty much NEVER have bad dreams. And yet, since the confinement, I'd say that I had bad dreams 6 nights out of 7.
Also : been tired and more stressed out than usual, even tho my conscious thoughts are roughly the same (except moments where the loneliness really drags me down, but so far, it only happened a couple of times).
Makes you wonder, tho: would life be "worth it" if it were always like that? Cause I live, but kinda waiting for this moment t be over so life can "start again" (and so I can see my girlfriend ahaha)... but in a way, we should never feel like life is "on hold". It's always "full". Idk!
Thank you again for the support ❤️
I'm not complaining, it could be a lot worse
"How Small A Thought It Takes To Fill A Whole Life"
Wittgenstein