Hello again. You need an actual medical doctor, my friend. See to it immediately. No joke. Hearing negative voices is a real basic sign that you need a Psychiatrist and to stay away from psychedelic drugs. I believe you may have been here before, and been told this before and maybe you're just stubborn. Psychedelic Drugs will likely only make things worse for you.

Sounds like you have some pretty wise friends there.

Music and poetry can be very healing! Great advice I agree!

Hang in there and stay as positive as you can right now. It will pass. Vent here if you need to. Go see a doctor and get some professional advice. No shame in seeking help. In fact I think it is very courageous to post what you have here! You are taking the first step in healing yourself. You don't have to do it alone. I think many here have been through some hard times and can relate to struggling with life from time to time. It's going to be ok!

Did something happen in your life that triggered this? Talk about it with those good friends of yours. Reach out to someone you can trust.

Wishing the best for you friend!!

I can understand where you're coming from protostar, but I agree with Wolfnippletip. You definitely do not have the right 'set' for psychedelics at this time and a legitimate psychiatrist may help guide you.

One piece of advise i can offer is to stop worrying so much about what others think of you or whether or not they understand you. That only affects you if you let it. Being accepted by others is not something you can force. The only person that needs to accept and be happy with who you are is yourself.

Grasshopper, you actually seem rather "normal", if a bit addled. Flirting with psychosis can be a sign you might want to, "come down off your throne and leave your body alone". Cliched, yet realistic. The basics of rest, diet, exercise and cultivating ANY endeavor you find wholesome>>>music, poetry. Boring but sound advice.

Life cycles! Stay the course with equanimity. Psychedelics don't DELIVER answers. They catalyze mind states that reveal a significantly LESS avid binding of cognition to ego, than, is typically had during mundane, consensus, default consciousness state. Accurate or not, the experience informs that, maybe just maybe, ego is a psychological "operation"(necessary) NOT an actual, autonomous, time-travelling control agent as is typically perceived. Psychedelics, unbind/decouple, awareness/consciousness from our IDEA of ourselves.

Briefly, they(psychedelics) allow one to build an alternative "mental model" that is indeed archetypal. It reinforces the utility in gaining insight into our experience BOTH exoterically and esoterically, rationally and mystically.

If indeed if you've "enjoyed" psychedelics previously, you may well cycle back to these tools at a point in life when you need a refresher course in ego softening!

Peace

If psychedelics are doing you no good then you should stop taking them. It's simple. Maybe in the future when you resolve your feelings you can revisit. I hope things get better for you.

Ayye, hope everything is ok.

Sometimes even things like meditation might not be the best.. regular life, doing whatever someone does could be considered mediation. You don't need to sit there and meditate.

Buddha said there's no reason to ask these deep questions of life and though it's not bad to ask, there is no amswer...

Ive gone/go through similar things as you describe and the best thing it seems is to step back and listen to what's going on with me and the world around. Other people's judgements or opinions don't matter, though if they are coming from a well intended , warm, logical person they can offer insight, but it's really your own mind that matters. If someone is acting negatively the get away for them or , if you cant, step back from them and observe and see that it is based on their own problems that they could get away from too.

Psychedelics are not the answer, they have there uses of course and can give insight , but they will not change you. I've gotten insights from them before but it is nothing that is not already there inside you.. I have not taken any psychs in over 2 years because there is no reason for it. I have plenty of things going on in real life being sober.

Listen to your intuition and take care of yourself and others when you are able to.

<3

Off the top of my pointy little head, I don't recall the other posts that others have mentioned of yours on the subject. If that's the case, you may be being seem as "stubborn" or as someone who keeps posing the same question in hopes of hearing the answer you desire.

Not so sure you're"crazy". Perhaps you,like me,are particularly sensitive and have not yet learned to navigate that level of empathy. Is the paranoia just self importance? I'll often think that I'm causing people's negative attitudes when they aren't even cognizant of me in reality. I'm sick yes, but crazy, not so terribly much. Just a normal western neurotic.

I've used psychedelics with success to address many if these things AS PART OF am integrative system of self discovery and recovery. My problems were easy to identify-drug addiction,suicidal ideation but the causes were not. The psychedelics provide me with the following:1) an experiential awareness of something greater than myself that I am yet an intrinsic part of. This is the, for a debilitating lack of terminology, the spiritual foundation that is integral to move from healing into recovery-the "higher power" of AA. As a man with no faith, this is how I need to approach this.
2)much of my worldview was developed with the help of psychedelics at a young age, I am familiar, comfortable, and adept at navigating high dose experiences. I use occasional macro doses to blow out the cobwebs in my brain that accumulate over my non physical awareness over time and cause me to question the wisdom and veracity of my path. Not everyone resonates with the idea that there is more to reality and consciousness than there appears. Without conviction, questions about your experience lead to the state you describe.
It does not sound as if you are supported by those in your life for your explorations. They may have very valid concerns,knowing you personally far better than some internet jerk. Or they may have no way to see what you are doing as anything but immoral,or detrimental,illegal, getting loaded etc. They may be right as far as you're concerned,I'm not questioning them.

3) micro doses help me with addressing symptoms. I do not tolerate psych meds and am fundamentally opposed to them in my case.

As for you, I'm not really giving advice but answering your last?. My hope for you is clarity and peace. Yes, the mysteries ate worth exploring and you feel the call to do so.

I will suggest to you to do some reading. The questions you have have been the bane of the short life span of everyone who has ever lived. Many of them have written some pretty deep shit. Maybe once you are armed with more wisdom from the ages, you can better map out your explorations.

Oh, and maybe going to a therapist.

Peace, be good to you.